


A Flicker Then Just Smoke

by lovesnarf (snarfette)



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Alternate Universe, Fire, Firefighters, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-22
Updated: 2017-10-01
Packaged: 2018-12-05 10:34:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 40,329
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11576295
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snarfette/pseuds/lovesnarf
Summary: Setting his kitchen on fire should not have been the best thing that happened to Robert that year. But meeting Aaron, the gorgeous fireman, certainly helped him to see that every cloud has a silver lining.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Seeing as you are all lovely and made me feel so welcome in the Robron fandom, I thought I'd write something new for the boys. 
> 
> The title comes from 'Just Smoke' by Mumford and Sons.
> 
> I hope you enjoy! Feedback would be lovely, please. And it always encourages me to write faster. 
> 
> A fairly short chapter to get us started...

Red-rimmed eyes were not exactly his most attractive feature in that moment. Hacking up a lung wasn’t doing much for his general appeal either. Hardly the best impression to be making on the gorgeous firefighter who was walking towards him.

Although, Robert decided, he probably should have been less bothered about that and more concerned about the fact that his kitchen had just been on fire.

The kindly paramedic had wrapped one of those foil blankets around his shoulders and handed him an oxygen mask as he sat on the stretcher in the ambulance. Fortunately, he hadn’t been burnt, just inhaled a bit of smoke, had the shock of his life, and felt rather foolish.

The fireman had taken off his helmet and shed the bulky coat that protected his upper body, revealing gelled, dark hair and a tight-fitting navy t-shirt that hugged his chest and arms in all the right places.

Robert swallowed thickly as the man approached, almost setting off another coughing fit, before he shuffled to the edge of the little bed and pushed the blanket off his shoulders. He pulled himself up a little straighter as the firefighter looked toward the paramedic and received a nod, presumably confirming that Robert wasn’t about to keel over – at least not from smoke inhalation anyway.

“Sir? Are you the owner of the flat?” the firefighter asked as he stood at the foot of the steps leading up to the ambulance doors.

“That would be me,” Robert croaked. ‘ _Sounding like you’ve swallowed gravel – add that to the list of unattractive qualities_ ,’ he thought to himself.

“I wanted to let you know that we’ve successfully extinguished the fire in your kitchen,” the man told him.

“Thank you,” Robert replied with what he hoped was a decent smile.

“It looks like the fire started on the hob. Do you remember what happened?”

Robert winced. This was just going to make him appear even worse. This bloke was probably one of those safety conscience types that couldn’t tolerate idiots who didn’t respect fire. Robert was sure he was more likely to be getting a lecture than a phone number off this guy.

“It’s stupid, really,” he started. “I was frying bacon and I just went through to get my phone charger from the bedroom. I must’ve left the tea towel too close because by the time I came back…well, it seemed like the whole oven was on fire. It spread so quickly.” He shook his head a little and looked down at the floor of the ambulance.

Despite feeling embarrassed about the situation, he was also pretty shaken. Walking back through to the kitchen to find a blazing fire with the smoke alarm finally coming to life and screaming out its warning had caused Robert’s heart to simultaneously drop to his stomach and start pounding at a million beats per minute. Apart from the natural human reaction to fire, he had plenty of reason to be even more terrified and for a split second he’d pictured his mother’s face contorted by screams before he’d shaken the image away.  

He’d panicked. Of course he’d bloody panicked. His kitchen was on fire. And for a moment he hadn’t had a clue what to do. Then he’d vaguely remembered something about wet towels and tried to put the fire out himself. It was a miracle he hadn’t been burned. He’d given up on that heroic plan after mere seconds and found himself dialling 999 as the smoke in the kitchen got blacker and thicker, and he ended up stumbling out of his apartment hardly able to see where he was going as his eyes streamed and his throat rebelled against the smoke he’d breathed in.

“Hey,” a voice brought him back to the present. “It’s alright, you know. It happens all the time – it’s not stupid. You got out safely and the fire’s out now – that’s the main thing.”

Robert gave him a tight smile. “Yeah. Thanks.”

“Listen, have you got somewhere you can stay for a bit? Your place is going to need some work. The kitchen’s obviously got the worst damage but the rest of it will need some cleaning because of the smoke damage.”

Now probably wasn’t the moment to make a suggestive comment about staying at the sexy fireman’s place, but it was on the tip of Robert’s tongue. He didn’t even know if the bloke was interested in men but he could fantasise. There had to be some positives to this whole mess.

He cleared his throat, hoping some of the scratchiness might be wearing off. “I’ll ring my sister, see if I can stay in her spare room for a while.”

“That’s good,” the man replied. He looked like he was about to say something else, but he was cut off by a shout from behind him.

“Dingle!”

He turned around as another young firefighter clambered up into the fire engine.

“What?” he shouted back.

“Time to go,” his colleague yelled at him. “Stop flirting!”

The fireman turned back to Robert with a clenched jaw and, Robert was delighted to see, a flush creeping across his cheeks. “Dickhead,” he muttered under his breath. “I’d better get going,” he said to Robert. “Um, see ya.”

With that, he turned and jogged back to the fire truck. He pulled himself up and Robert watched as he punched his co-worker in the arm. The other fireman was clearly laughing hysterically as the truck started up.

As the fire engine slowly moved out of the building’s car park, Robert stood up and moved to the door of the ambulance. He was just in time to see ‘Fireman Dingle’ looking back at him as the truck swung round before it exited the car park and disappeared down the street.

***

Robert hadn’t gone in to work the day after the fire.

As soon as the fire truck had pulled out of the car park, he’d called his sister, told her the whole disastrous tale and asked to stay in her spare room for a few weeks while his flat was repaired.

Victoria had been more than willing to oblige, just pleased to know that her big brother had survived with no major injuries. She’d pulled him into a tight embrace when she opened the door to find him standing outside with a large kit bag full of clothes in his hand.

Robert would normally have patted her on the back and extracted himself from the hug fairly quickly, but, for once, he allowed himself to be held. Maybe it was the shock. All he knew was that he could feel slight tremors running through his whole body and he could only put it down to the adrenaline leaving him in one great rush. So, for a few moments, he clung onto his little sister gratefully.

After settling in at Vic’s, he’d rung his boss and explained that he wouldn’t be in, not least because he needed some personal time to organise the workmen that would need to sort out his destroyed kitchen and smoke-damaged apartment.

It was twenty-four hours after the fire that Robert found himself standing on the fire station’s forecourt clutching a large plastic Tupperware. He smoothed down his jumper and approached the large rolled up shutters. He’d seen people coming and going as he’d walked towards the station from where he’d parked his car, but hadn’t caught sight of the gorgeous fireman from the day before.  

As he drew closer, he saw the young firefighter who had been winding up the reason for Robert’s visit, ‘Fireman Dingle’. He was leaning over an open toolbox, but he glanced up when he noticed Robert approaching.

“Alright?” he said, as he stood up to greet Robert.

Robert felt a little self-conscious, but he wasn’t going to let that stop him. “Um, hi, I was….well, your crew came out to my apartment yesterday for the kitchen fire and I just wanted to drop by and say thanks for your help. I brought cake.”

The young fireman smiled brightly and accepted the box when Robert held it out to him. “Nice one, mate,” he said cheerfully. He peered into the box with a pleased look on his face. “I guess you’re here to see Aaron, then,” he announced with a waggle of his eyebrows and a knowing nod.

Before Robert could respond, and really he didn’t know what to say anyway, except for, ‘bloody hell, am I that obvious?’ and ‘oh, his name’s Aaron, then,’ the other man had turned around and bellowed at the top of his lungs, “Dingle! Visitor for you!”

There were a few moments of silence before ‘Aaron’ emerged from the back of the station, reprimanding his friend as he walked over. “Fucking hell, you’re such a loud-mouthed twat,” he grumbled, before he noticed Robert standing there and fell silent.

The fireman was even better looking than Robert had remembered. His vision had obviously been impaired by the smoke the previous day because Robert’s memory hadn’t done this bloke any justice really. His eyes were a more stunning shade of blue, his muscled arms were more defined and his lips looked softer. Robert was _so_ glad he’d made the decision to pop down to the fire station.

The ‘loud-mouthed twat’ seemed to be enjoying himself as he looked between the two of them with a smug smile on his face, before he wandered past Aaron, thumped him on the shoulder and announced, “He brought cake,” by way of explanation as he disappeared with the box.

“I wanted to say ‘thanks’,” Robert said immediately, not wanting an awkward silence to develop.

“So you made a cake,” Aaron stated, but it half-sounded like a question.

“Yes, well, no,” Robert started. “ _I_ didn’t make a cake. I asked my sister to make one seeing as I _clearly_ can’t be trusted in a kitchen.”

Aaron smiled a little at that and Robert tried very hard not to grin too much at his reaction. He didn’t want to look crazy _. But_ , he wondered, _maybe I already do look a bit nuts coming down here like this. Maybe this is actually very inappropriate behaviour._ He somehow couldn’t find it within himself to care all that much.

“Well, it was very good of you,” Aaron said. “The lads’ll demolish it with tea later.”

“No worries,” Robert said as he stuffed his hands into the pockets of his jacket. He had to make a move now before things got awkward. One way or another, he had to know if he was on the right track with the way he _thought_ Aaron had been looking at him. “I’m sure you get lots of damsels in distress coming down here to say thanks and showering you with gifts.”

Aaron breathed out a soft laugh at the words. “We have a few,” he replied. “But I send them Adam’s way.”

Robert’s smile widened as he heard Aaron’s words. He became aware that he was gently swaying from side to side, but strangely enough so was Aaron as he stood there with his hands shoved into his uniform trousers looking at Robert expectantly. _Now or never_ , he decided.

“Listen, um, I was wondering if you’d let me take you out for a drink…to say thanks,” he said, and smiled his most charming smile.

Aaron smiled back at him. “I’m sure the lads would love it,” he replied easily.

Robert’s face fell and his mouth flapped a few times as he tried to think of a way to get out of taking a whole fire crew to the pub for a drink. _Not_ what he had in mind at all. And his bank balance wouldn’t thank him for it either.

Aaron suddenly laughed. “I’m just messing with ya, Sorry.” He laughed again. “If the offer’s still open, I’d really like that.”

Robert felt the relief wash through him – he wasn’t going to be taking the whole crew out, but Aaron had agreed. He shook his head but couldn’t help the smile on his face. “Okay,” he said. “Well, if you give me your number, I’ll be in touch.”

Aaron obliged and Robert typed the number into his phone. He smiled at Aaron once more before he took a step backwards. “So, I’ll give you a call, then.”

“One more thing,” Aaron called to him.

Robert stopped and waited for his next words.

“What’s your name? I can’t exactly call you ‘15th September, kitchen fire’.”

Robert laughed brightly. Something about Aaron seemed to light him up from inside.

“It’s Robert,” he said with a smile. “Robert Sugden.”

Aaron smiled at him and nodded.

Then they both turned around and headed back where they’d come from. Robert forced himself not to turn around to watch Aaron walking away, but he did wonder if Aaron was doing the same. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the lovely feedback about Chapter 1. I'm pleased you're enjoying the light-heartedness of this fic so far! I can't promise that it will stay angst-free throughout, but for now, enjoy!

It took Aaron less than an hour in the pub with Robert to realise two things. One: his suspicions about Robert being a complete charmer were entirely accurate, and two: he definitely wanted Robert.

Picking up a bloke after they’d tackled a fire in his flat wasn’t exactly something Aaron did regularly. In fact, he’d never felt the urge to see any of the victims of fires they’d been called to after the event. At least not in a ‘let’s go for a drink and hopefully a shag’ kind of way. But there was something magnetic about Robert.

Aaron might have forgotten all about him if he hadn’t turned up at the fire station looking so much more gorgeous than he had as he sat in the back of an ambulance the previous day. And now, as Aaron sat across from him at a small table in the busy pub, he knew there was no way he’d be walking away from Robert without getting what they both so clearly wanted.

Because Robert wasn’t subtle in his flirtations at all. He had this smile on his face that told Aaron he knew exactly what he was doing. Every so often, his tongue would peek out from between his lips after he’d taken a sip from his pint and he’d run it across his lips deliberately slowly. Aaron couldn’t help but watch its progress and then when he looked up again Robert would be watching him with a slightly raised eyebrow and a cocky smirk pulling at his lips. Aaron would take a gulp from his own pint just to give him something to focus on so he could hopefully avoid looking too obvious.

“So, have you ever done one of those calendars?” Robert asked. The same smirk was still on his face.

“Calendars?” Aaron asked in confusion. Their conversation had covered a pretty random selection of topics, nothing too in-depth or personal, and Aaron had to admit that he’d been caught off guard a couple of times by Robert’s changes of subject.

“You know, sexy firemen,” Robert explained. “The kind of thing that people buy as ‘Secret Santa’ gifts or for middle-aged women to perv on.”

Aaron huffed out a laugh. “I don’t think they usually come looking for talent for that kind of thing in Leeds, mate.”

“Hmm, I dunno,” Robert said with a slight tilt of his head. “I think they’d find plenty of talent if they came to your station.” He took a quick sip and licked his lips in that infuriating way again as Aaron felt himself get a little flustered. “I mean, your mate, Adam, is it? He’s pretty hot.”

Aaron frowned at Robert’s words before Robert, the git, burst out laughing. He leant across the table and smirked again. “Although, I think I’d rather have you as my Mr. April hanging on the wall. Obviously, I’d be willing to assess the talent situation and feedback to the calendar company.”

Aaron leaned in a little closer too. “You’re so full of bullshit, you know,” he said just loudly enough to be heard over the noise in the pub.

Robert grinned and his eyebrow rose again. “I’d offer to take you back to mine to make up for it, but, as you know, I’m kind of homeless at the minute.”

Aaron tried his best to hide his interest in the idea of going home with Robert. He wanted to at least _try_ to play it cool. He tipped his head to the side and his mouth pulled down at the corners. “I suppose you’d better come back to mine then,” he eventually offered. He was more than a little bit pleased to see the flash of anticipation in Robert’s eyes as he nodded, downed the remainder of his pint and stood up.

***

Fortunately it was only short walk back to Aaron’s flat from the pub. An almost tangible desire had built between them as they walked side by side, continuing the teasing banter from earlier on in the evening.

As Aaron found himself pressed back against the, thankfully closed, door of his flat with Robert’s lips desperately moving against his own, he wondered for a brief moment how they’d even managed to make it inside instead of giving in to the sexual tension between them and disappearing down an alleyway for a quick blowjob. He was glad they’d made it back to his flat. He wanted to savour every moment of this encounter.

One of Robert’s hands was grasping the back of Aaron’s head, his fingers stroking against the short hairs. The other had slid across his hip, his thumb sneaking underneath Aaron’s thin jumper to smooth across the skin above his waistband.

Aaron had barely heard the door click shut and kicked off his shoes when Robert had surged towards him, first pulling him in with a hand behind his head, then walking him backwards the two paces he’d managed to move so his back was pressed against the wood of the door. He wasn’t complaining. The kiss was everything he’d imagined it would be – Robert’s lips as soft as they looked, his hands as powerful as he’d thought they’d be as he’d watched him in the pub, and that tongue, the one that had teased him mercilessly as they sat with their pints, that now licked its way into his mouth, was just as arousing as he’d hoped.

He met Robert’s kiss with equal passion. His own hands slipped inside Robert’s leather jacket and began to push it away from his shoulders, working it down his arms as Robert had to release his grip on Aaron in order to remove it completely. Robert’s hands immediately sought him out again, grasping at his belt to draw their bodies closer.

The frantic nature of their kissing, with teeth and tongues clashing, and hands grasping, was only spurred on by the feel of their bodies pressing even more closely together. Aaron had been half-hard in anticipation since they’d left the pub, but now he was achingly aroused, his cock straining against the stiff denim of his jeans as Robert angled his body against him perfectly.

“Fucking hell,” he groaned as he pulled his lips away from Robert’s.

They were both panting heavily; Robert still close enough that each breath ghosted across Aaron’s lips leaving him tingling.

Robert was watching him with hungry, lust-darkened eyes. He seemed to be drinking in every part of Aaron’s face and very much enjoying what he saw. Suddenly he moved forwards again, one large hand cupping Aaron’s face as he leant in and attached his lips to the tender flesh of his throat. Aaron felt his knees weaken at the sensation of Robert’s teeth grazing across the delicate skin before he ran his tongue across the same patch. A moan slipped from Aaron’s lips accompanied by a shudder of pure pleasure. Robert had immediately zoned in on one of his favourite places to be touched and he clearly knew it seeing as Aaron could feel that he was smiling against his neck between the kisses he placed there.

“Bedroom,” Aaron grunted. “Now,” he added as he pulled on Robert’s hair slightly when the blond man showed no signs of drawing his mouth away from Aaron’s neck.

Aaron managed to slip out from his position pressed against the door and dragged Robert along to his bedroom, where he kicked the door open before spinning around to pull Robert back into another searing kiss. The need to be touching Robert was almost overwhelming. He grabbed the material of Robert’s shirt and yanked it out of the waistband of his jeans and then attempted to make quick work of the buttons. His fingers fumbled several times as he got distracted by Robert’s hands yet again wandering underneath his jumper, before they finally peeled it over his head and threw it to the floor. Finally, Aaron managed to deal with the last button and he hurriedly pushed the material away from Robert’s shoulders and down his arms until it dropped to the floor. Aaron took a moment to admire the broadness of Robert’s chest and all the smooth, pale skin that had been revealed, before he felt fingers at his belt and he was quickly distracted again.

Robert didn’t seem to have any problem with multi-tasking as he leant in to kiss Aaron again whilst his fingers tackled his belt. He was even managing to walk Aaron backwards towards his bed at the same time.

“I want to blow you,” Robert breathed against his ear.

The shiver that ran through Aaron’s body was accompanied by his dick twitching in his now unzipped jeans, as the words rushed over his sensitive flesh. “God, yes,” he groaned out in reply.

Apparently Robert didn’t need any further encouragement as he immediately dropped to his knees and began working Aaron’s jeans down his thighs. As soon as the item of clothing was successfully removed, Robert returned his lips to Aaron; this time to the soft skin of his stomach. Teasingly, he licked and nipped his way across the flesh just above the waistband of Aaron’s boxers before he drew back and mouthed at Aaron’s erection through the thin material of his underwear.

“ _Fuck_ ,” Aaron moaned out. He grabbed Robert’s shoulders to steady himself as he felt his knees shake a little.

“You like that, hmm?” Robert paused to ask cheekily. 

With a confident smirk up at him, Robert pulled the elastic of the waistband and dragged Aaron’s boxers down freeing his achingly hard cock. Aaron watched Robert’s face as he eyed his erection and then he looked up and their eyes met. And then Robert licked his lips, just like he’d been doing earlier on at the pub, in exactly the same way that he’d obviously been torturing Aaron all night. The bloody git. If Aaron wasn’t so turned on, he’d call Robert out for teasing him, but he really didn’t want anything to distract Robert from the task at hand, or mouth as it were.

Aaron brought his hand up to stroke through the short hair at the base of Robert’s skull and suddenly Robert was moving forward, taking him into his mouth. For a moment, Aaron felt like he’d forgotten how to breathe. He couldn’t tear his eyes away from the sight of Robert on his knees, his lips stretched around him and his cheeks hollowed out. One of Robert’s hands was wrapped around the base of Aaron’s cock while the other caressed his arse cheek.

Moving his fingers from the back of Robert’s head, they stroked across his cheek and down to the defined jawline that was currently working to deliver the most exquisite pleasure. After their exploration, his hands found their way back to Robert’s hair and his fingers twisted slightly in the longer hair on top of his head. It seemed that Robert enjoyed the sensation as he moaned lowly around Aaron’s cock; the vibrations from his noise sending a further jolt of pleasure down Aaron’s spine. He felt like his body was liquefying; well, apart from his cock. There was a tingling sensation building inside him and he knew that he was getting close. The sight of Robert palming at his own erection inside his unzipped jeans just pushed him further towards his release.

“Robert…” he panted. “Robert, I’m gonna come.”

Aaron hadn’t known how Robert would react to his announcement, but he was more than a little pleased when he just seemed to be spurred on by the news. The sensations around Aaron’s cock seemed to intensify as Robert moved his hand to tease at his balls. Aaron tightened his grip in Robert’s hair and leaned his other hand against his shoulder as he felt his orgasm hit him. He cried out, throwing his head back as he tried in vain to keep some control over his hips as they thrust forwards wildly.

Robert sucked him through the whole thing before allowing Aaron to slip free from his lips. As Aaron shuddered from the pleasure, he glanced down to see Robert smirking up at him and that bloody tongue was back, licking across his lips again. And Aaron knew in that moment, that whatever else happened that night, it wasn’t going to be a one off. He was going to need a repeat performance.

Aaron decided that Robert looked far too cocky in that moment, on his knees, licking the remnants of Aaron’s release off his lips. He yanked him up and smashed their lips together. The taste of himself as he licked into Robert’s mouth reminded him that he’d just been given one hell of an orgasm and he was pretty determined to give Robert one in return.

He hauled Robert closer, his hands pushing down the material of Robert’s jeans as he simultaneously pulled him towards him. It was a miracle that they didn’t fall over, what with Aaron tugging at Robert, and Robert’s trousers and underwear tangled around his ankles until he managed to kick them free and follow Aaron eagerly towards his bed.

They tumbled down onto the mattress and Aaron immediately straddled Robert’s hips, leaning down to run his tongue across Robert’s chest, nipping at his flesh every so often before kissing each patch gently again. He could feel Robert beginning to writhe beneath him, his body reacting to each stroke of his tongue or graze of his teeth. Focusing on one of Robert’s nipples, he gently nipped at it before swirling his tongue across the sensitive skin. Internally he did a little fist bump when he felt Robert shudder beneath him and his hard cock twitch against his arse, knowing that he’d found one of Robert’s favourite places to be touched.

“Like that, do ya?” he questioned, teasing Robert with his own cocky observation from earlier. As he spoke, his breath tickled across the wet skin surrounding Robert’s nipple and the other man shivered as goose bumps rose all over his skin.

“What do you want?” Aaron asked him in a low voice before he attached his lips to Robert’s other nipple. 

Letting out a groan, Robert’s hand twisted in his hair as he wriggled around on the bed. “Christ…Aaron,” he moaned. “I want to fuck you.”

The words sent a jolt of heat through Aaron and he felt his cock begin to react to the idea, eve n though it hadn’t been that long since he felt like Robert had sucked his brain out through it.

“Yeah,” he breathed against Robert’s chest. “Let’s do that.”

He rolled off Robert and reached into his bedside cabinet, pulling out a bottle of lube and a box of condoms. He dropped the condoms on top of the cabinet but held out the lube to Robert with a smirk on his face.

Robert didn’t seem to be in any hurry despite his desperate declaration of just moments before. He pushed Aaron back against his pillow, pressing him into the mattress with his body, and kissed him deeply again, his tongue licking into Aaron’s mouth as his hands wandered over his body. At some point, he must have grabbed the lube because he was suddenly between Aaron’s thighs, spreading them apart further as his fingers teased at his balls before dipping lower and circling around his hole. Tearing his lips away from Robert’s, Aaron drew in a sharp breath at the feeling of one of Robert’s long fingers covered in cool lube pressing against his opening.

“Alright?” Robert whispered against his ear, as he hovered over him. His fingers had stilled in their actions as he waited for Aaron’s response.

Aaron looked up at him. He knew he was probably going a bit cross-eyed from staring at Robert so close up, but he really enjoyed looking at the other man’s face. And the fact that Robert, for all his confident swagger and charm, seemed so genuinely interested in making sure he was okay, warmed him all the way through. And hell yes, he was alright. He realised suddenly that he should probably share that with Robert before he gave up on waiting and headed for home, or wondered if Aaron had drifted into some sort of trance.

“Yeah, definitely alright,” he confirmed. “Don’t stop.”

Robert kissed him again, and Aaron really didn’t think he’d ever been kissed like he had that night. There was something incredibly passionate in the way that Robert seemed to claim his mouth. At the same time, Robert pressed his finger against Aaron’s hole again and eased it past the ring of muscle there. He worked his finger in and out, building a rhythm, before he pressed in with a second, then a third, repeating the action, and Aaron felt heat moving its way up his body. He could feel the way his chest was beginning to flush, but he didn’t care as he began to fuck himself against Robert’s fingers.

“Oh… _fuck_ ,” he groaned as Robert’s fingers grazed across his prostate. His cock was fully hard again and he was pretty sure that if Robert hadn’t pulled his fingers away at that moment, he’d have been well on his way to his second orgasm of the evening.

Aaron reached for the condoms and handed one over to Robert who quickly ripped it open and carefully rolled it on to his own cock. He squeezed out more lube into his hand and gave himself a few long strokes to cover the condom. His eyes closed for a moment as he touched himself and Aaron suddenly had the urge to watch Robert get himself off. He could just imagine how hot he’d look, writhing about on the bed as he stroked himself. The thought sent more heat through Aaron, but he filed it away for some point in the future, either as his own fantasy wanking material, or as something to ask of Robert if they decided to see each other again. He got the feeling that Robert wouldn’t mind being the main event in a show for Aaron.

After a few rough strokes, Robert opened his eyes again and leant over Aaron, once more claiming his mouth in a deep kiss. Then he moved away from his lips and kissed his way along Aaron’s jawline and up to his neck where he once again sucked at the spot guaranteed to make Aaron’s toes curl in pleasure.

“Ready?” he whispered against Aaron’s ear, before he nipped at his ear lobe and tugged gently. He was rocking against Aaron’s hips and Aaron wondered if he even realised he was doing it or if he was just so caught up in his need to get off that his body was moving of its own accord. The thought that he was having that effect on Robert only made Aaron more desperate to feel him inside him as soon as possible.

“Fuck, yes,” Aaron replied, his head thrown back to expose his neck even further, his fingers threaded into Robert’s hair as he shuddered.

It was almost a disappointment when Robert backed away and moved down his body once more. Almost. Aaron was well aware of what was going to happen next so he couldn’t be too upset about the loss of Robert’s skilful mouth on his throat driving him wild.

He let his thighs fall open as Robert settled between them once more. Then he wrapped his legs around Robert’s waist as Robert grabbed the base of his cock to guide it towards Aaron’s waiting hole. Steadily, Robert pushed forward into the slick opening and Aaron could tell he was forcing himself to take it slow. By the time he’d bottomed out, they were both panting, a light sheen of sweat already coating their skin.

Robert took a few deep steadying breaths before he began to roll his hips, Aaron running his fingers across the muscles of Robert’s back, loving the feel of them shifting beneath his hands as Robert moved. The rhythm was slow and shallow to begin with, but eventually Aaron squeezed his thighs more tightly around Robert’s waist.

“Come on,” he urged. “Fuck me, Robert.”

Aaron was pleased that Robert didn’t need to be told twice. On the next thrust, he pushed deeper, then drew back further and slammed his hips forward again. Aaron’s back arched up from his bed and he moaned long and loud as Robert repeated his actions again and again.

“Is that what you wanted?” Robert panted between thrusts.

“ _Fucking_ …ah… _yes_!” Aaron cried out as Robert’s cock brushed against his prostate.

Aaron’s blunt fingernails dug into the damp skin of Robert’s back as he felt the heat curling inside him.

Suddenly Robert leant down to kiss him, his tongue thrusting into his mouth desperately. The shift in angle made Robert’s cock drive even deeper inside Aaron and his own dick was trapped between the heat of their bodies, the friction of their stomachs driving Aaron closer to the edge.

Robert’s ragged breaths were interrupted by a low groan and then Aaron could feel him shaking as his cock pulsed inside him. He continued to thrust his hips but his movements had lost their rhythm and Robert was no longer kissing him, merely panting against his neck as he shuddered through his orgasm. Aaron was nearly there himself. He just needed a little more. For the briefest of moments he was concerned that Robert was going to collapse on him and leave him dangling on the precipice of his release, but Robert was still moving, albeit with much less co-ordination, and then he reached between them and took Aaron’s cock firmly in his hand. He pumped his fist up the shaft as he lifted his head from Aaron’s sweaty neck to look down at him.

“Fucking hell, you look so hot like this,” he commented as his hand continue to move. He pressed his lips to Aaron’s again, but it didn’t last as Aaron tore his mouth away to press his head back against the pillow and moan out in elation as Robert stroked his second orgasm of the night out of him.

When his breathing had returned to normal and he’d managed to open his eyes again, Aaron looked down at his stomach and chest to see the mess he’d made all over himself. Then he glanced up at Robert who was looking exceedingly pleased with himself. ‘ _He_ should _be looking pleased with himself. That was one of the best shags I’ve ever had_ ,’ Aaron thought to himself. But there was no way he was going to say that out loud – Robert didn’t need his ego massaging any further. Instead, he stretched his arms above his head and smirked to himself at the way Robert’s eyes wandered over his body.

“I’d better get rid of this,” Robert said after he’d finished admiring the view. He’d pulled the condom off and was pushing himself up off the bed. He dropped it into the little bin in the corner of the bedroom and then set about locating his clothes that were scattered all over the floor.

It was a little disappointing to see Robert pulling his clothes back on, mostly because Aaron really enjoyed the sight of Robert’s smooth, pale skin, but Aaron had known what he was getting as soon as he’d invited the other man back to his flat. A one night stand with no strings attached was exactly what he’d been looking for and he was pretty certain that Robert had been after the same thing. Although he had to admit, that after what had just happened, he certainly wouldn’t have said no to second meeting.

Despite the fact that he was knackered, he pushed himself up and padded across the hall into his bathroom to clean up a little. He’d shower later after Robert had gone. He found his boxers and pulled them on as he tried not to make it obvious that he was watching Robert get dressed.

Eventually, Robert seemed to have found everything and put himself back together. Aaron had tugged his jeans back on but didn’t really see the point in putting his jumper back on when he was going to take it all back off the moment that Robert left.

Robert approached him slowly and, for the first time, Aaron thought he actually looked a little shy. It was strange really seeing as less than fifteen minutes ago they’d been shagging.

“I’d better get going,” he said as he stood in front of Aaron, one hand scratching at the side of his head.

Aaron nodded. “Sure. Thanks for a good night.”

“Yeah.” He smiled a little. He looked like he might say something else but he hesitated.

They wandered into the hallway and back towards the door of the flat. When they got to the door, they stopped and both of them stood there not really knowing what to do. This wasn’t the first one night stand he’d had, so Aaron couldn’t quite figure out what was different. Why hadn’t he opened the door, said goodbye, and shut it behind Robert without a second thought?

“Look…uh…you’ve got my number, so if you…you know, you wanted to meet up…or something, you should give me a call,” Robert finally said.

Aaron felt himself let out a little sigh of relief. That’s what he’d wanted to say but hadn’t quite figured out how to. All he knew was that the sex he’d just had was definitely worth a repeat performance.

“’Or something’ sounds good,” he agreed with a cheeky smile.

Robert smirked at him and the cockiness that Aaron already seemed to be used to was instantly back in place.

“I’ll see you around then,” he said.

“Yeah, see you around,” Aaron replied.

Robert opened the door and stepped out into the hallway. As Aaron was about to close the door, Robert turned back around and smiled at him. Aaron returned the smile and closed the door. He leant back against the wood of the door and ran his hand through his messy hair. Then he pushed himself away and headed for the bathroom. He was still grinning to himself as he caught sight of his reflection in the bathroom mirror.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back after a week or so away on holiday, but I'm going away again in a few days so I'm not sure how quickly I'll be able to update after this chapter. Just thought I'd get this chapter uploaded so I wasn't keeping you hanging on for too long!
> 
> Thank you again for all the lovely feedback on the last chapter - you guys are the best!

Aaron did call. Six days later. It was just long enough for Robert to wonder if he should just get over himself and make the first move, regardless of whether or not he’d told Aaron to call and effectively left the ball in his court. Because there was no way that he was going to miss an opportunity to have Aaron again just because he was too proud to call him first. The sex had been too good to be a one-time only thing. He needed a second time. And maybe a third, and as many as Aaron was willing to join him for, as long as it kept being as amazing as that first evening.

So when Aaron had finally got in touch with him and arranged a get together at the same pub as before, Robert had been more than a little relieved. Obviously it wasn’t just him that felt the need to repeat their first encounter.

They’d gone back to the pub and had a pint, but it had become pretty apparent that they weren’t going to be there long enough to get a second round in. There had been almost an itch beneath Robert’s skin as he sat across the table from Aaron and wondered when would be an appropriate time to suggest that they went back to his flat. He’d desperately wanted to be with Aaron again; he could hardly contain himself. Fortunately, it seemed that Aaron had been experiencing something similar because he’d downed the remnants of his lager, pushed his chair back and nodded his head to the door. Robert hadn’t needed any further instruction as he’d jumped to his feet immediately and followed him.

They’d spent the rest of the evening in Aaron’s bed confirming that the first night hadn’t been a fluke or a one-off. They’d also confirmed that they would definitely be doing it again.

Apparently, Aaron worked weird shifts which explained why he hadn’t been in touch sooner, but Robert had no interest in tracking when he’d be working. He was only interested in when Aaron would be free to meet up.

They continued to meet up under the pretence of having a pint, as mates. But after one pint they’d both be grabbing their jackets and heading back to Aaron’s flat. Eventually they got to the point where popping into the pub was a ridiculous waste of time, and they both knew it, so they stopped going altogether and Robert would just head straight to Aaron’s flat instead.

So far, the sex had been as hot as their first night together. Robert was becoming more and more convinced that Aaron was the best shag he’d ever had. He wondered whether it was just something about how they seemed to fit together and Aaron seemed to read him so well, knowing exactly what he liked and how he wanted it. He also wondered if it was partly down to the fact that there were no strings attached. They were just fucking around with no feelings involved; they weren’t wondering about how serious things were getting, or when they should have deep and meaningful discussions. Robert turned up; they traded mind-blowing orgasms (sometimes several in one evening); Robert left. Simple.

They did get on well though. They were quickly becoming mates.

Aaron, who was at times a grumpy git, seemed to perk up, no matter what his mood, when Robert teased him playfully. He would roll his eyes in annoyance when Robert would smack him on the arse, but in the next moment would have him pinned to the nearest wall kissing him with a smile tugging at his lips.

And in turn, Aaron seemed to have an uncanny ability to bring Robert’s cockiness down a notch in a playful way. Robert knew that he had the gift of the gab; he’d always been a charmer, but Aaron seemed to see through his bullshit. He mocked him mercilessly about his love of comic books and superhero movies, but Robert never felt like he was saying it to be cruel. Aaron had developed an ability to be able to stop Robert’s charming talk in a few easy steps. His method usually involved his mouth, hands or dick, and Robert didn’t mind at all.  

They’d developed their own kind of personalised banter that always seemed to lead to one, or both, of them yelling out the other’s name as they came because that was the only way to shut each other up and it was great fun.

Robert thought it was pretty clichéd but they had actually become friends with benefits. _Loads of people do it, so it’ll be fine_ , he thought to himself, when it actually registered in his head what had happened. There were no strings, no feelings or other complicated stuff getting in the way – just the two of them, having a bit of fun and fantastic sex.

***

Robert woke up because he was too hot. They’d forgotten to put the window on vent last night and there didn’t seem to be any fresh air in the room at all. Aaron had probably ‘forgotten’ on purpose seeing as he always seemed to be cold and enjoyed snuggling into Robert’s back and pressing his ice-cold feet against Robert’s calves in the night. Robert, on the other hand, was like a human hot water bottle – Aaron’s description, not his own – so he liked to have the window open even on a late November morning like today. He supposed it was a little ironic that Aaron was the one who dealt with fire as part of his day-to-day life, but he was always complaining about being cold.

At first, Robert had wondered if it was a good idea, the whole staying over and waking up in Aaron’s bed thing. He’d wondered if it might change the way things were between them – he didn’t want to complicate their easy-going, purely physical involvement. But, after a brief spell of adjusting to it, Robert had found it seemed to be a fairly obvious choice. It wasn’t like he’d never had a relationship and shared a bed before; it was just different with Aaron, like most things seemed to be. They were just friends obviously, but sharing a bed had seemed to come quite naturally to them.

 

The first time that Robert had stayed over had been an accident. Aaron had fucked him so well that he’d collapsed in a sweaty heap afterwards and murmured something about needing five minutes before he moved. Aaron had whole-heartedly agreed with that suggestion and had pulled the duvet up and over them.

The next thing Robert knew, he was waking up to find Aaron plastered against his back and early morning sunlight flooding in through the curtains. He’d jolted up, knocking Aaron backwards across the bed and waking him up too, and grabbed for his phone to check the time. It was only half seven and if he’d been at Vic’s he’d still have had half an hour before he had to get up, but he didn’t have any of his stuff at Aaron’s and he’d need to get back and get showered and changed before he could head into work.

He’d staggered about, fumbling around for his clothes, as Aaron sleepily watched him through half-open eyes. He wasn’t a morning person and Robert’s abrupt wake-up hadn’t been the start to the day he’d hoped for. But, he’d had to admit, even in his sleepy state, that it was kind of nice to have Robert as the first thing he saw in the morning.

Robert’s constant muttering and cursing hadn’t exactly been ideal though.

“What ya doin’?” he’d grumbled into his pillow.

“Trying to find my fucking tie,” Robert had replied. “I’ve got to get back to Vic’s for a shower and to get changed and I’ve got to get to work for nine because I’ve got a meeting first thing. I can’t believe I fell asleep last night. I’m gonna be so fucking late if I can’t find my fucking tie.”

“Rob,” Aaron had grumbled. “Chill out, will ya?”

Robert had stopped what he was doing for a moment and looked at him incredulously as if Aaron had just said the most ridiculous thing imaginable.

After he’d pushed himself up in bed slightly so his chin was propped on his hand, Aaron had calmly said, “Just leave the ‘fucking’ tie here. You’re going back to Vic’s anyway so you’ll be getting changed. Next time you come over, bring some stuff for a shower and a change of clothes to leave here so if you end up staying over again or you fall asleep you don’t have this bloody panic attack again at ridiculous o’clock in the morning.”

Robert had wondered how Aaron had gone from drowsy to making perfect sense in a matter of minutes, but he’d had to admit that he was right. If he was going to be spending so much time at Aaron’s flat he might as well have some of his stuff there so he didn’t have to rush back to Vic’s in the morning if he ended up staying over again.

He’d been about to reply, but Aaron had continued talking.

“Besides, if you stay over, we might even have time for a quickie in the morning, or shower sex,” he’d remarked casually, with a little smirk on his face, and Robert had felt arousal stir within him at the prospect.

He hadn’t taken any further persuading that it was a good idea, and after that morning, Robert had found himself staying over more and more often as the weeks had gone by and when Aaron’s shifts had allowed it.

So it wasn’t unusual for him to have woken up in Aaron’s flat and it certainly wasn’t unusual for him to be too warm. Aaron seemed to gravitate towards him during the night. Even if they fell asleep on completely opposite sides of the bed, Aaron would end up curled around him somehow by the time they woke up. For the first time in his life, Robert had become the little spoon. And he’d never admit it out loud, but he really liked it. Even though he often woke up because of their combined body heat under the covers, he loved the feeling of Aaron cuddled into him, wrapped around him protectively, his breath tickling the back of Robert’s neck and his arm slung over Robert’s waist almost possessively.

But all of that was nothing strange, Robert told himself every time he woke up in Aaron’s arms and smiled softly to himself. He was bound to enjoy waking up to that feeling. Anyone would, surely. It was purely because his body obviously felt comfortable being held. Just a physical reaction.

If he secretly enjoyed the way that Aaron would tighten his grip on him if he started moving about to get up, that was nothing to dwell on. And if he’d taken to leaving Aaron a cup of tea on his bedside table and pressing a soft kiss on his forehead if he had to leave before the other man had woken up because he was off shift, that was perfectly normal _friendly_ behaviour. It was only polite really seeing as Aaron had allowed him to crash there again. 

That morning he made a brew for them both and slipped back under the covers. Aaron had stirred while he’d been in the kitchen so he sat propped up against his pillows as he gratefully received his morning cuppa.

“Cheers,” he murmured as he wrapped his hands around the mug. He wasn’t exactly a ‘morning person’, as Robert had quickly learnt, so he took a bit of time to get going when he first woke up. In fact, the only time that Robert had seen him become alert first thing in the morning was when he’d woken Aaron up with a blow-job that had left him crying out Robert’s name within minutes of regaining consciousness.

“It’s freezing this morning,” Aaron commented as he blew over the surface of his tea.

Robert rolled his eyes and shook his head slightly. “It’s really not,” he remarked. “What are ya going to do in January, if you already think it’s cold?”

“Hibernate,” Aaron replied simply.

Robert hummed. “Might have to join you if you plan on staying in bed for a few months.”

It was Aaron’s turn to roll his eyes as he took a sip of his tea. He glanced at his bedside clock. “Why aren’t you rushing about this morning?”

“I’m going over to my flat this morning, remember? I’ve not gotta be there ‘til ten,” Robert reminded him.

“Oh yeah, I’d forgotten that was today.”

It had been ten weeks since the fire in Robert’s kitchen that had left his flat uninhabitable. He’d been quick to organise his insurance company to come out and assess the damage and immediately called in contractors to start work on refitting his kitchen and cleaners to deal with the smoke damage to the rest of the flat.

Today was the day for him to go over and check out their work. All being well, he’d be moved back in by the end of the day. He’d had weekly progress reviews and was confident that everything had run to schedule. He really hoped so.

As much as he loved his sister, he really didn’t want to stay at Vic’s for any longer than necessary. She was great, they got on well, it’d been really good of her to let him stay on such short notice and for so long, but he needed to get back into his own place. And he couldn’t cope with her nosey questions about his ‘relationship’ (as she called it) with Aaron.

It didn’t matter how many times he told her they weren’t like that, it wasn’t serious between them, they were just mates, she always got this silly look on her face when he said he was going out and she just couldn’t resist asking him about it. She seemed to think he was ‘smitten’ (again, her choice of words) and smiled knowingly at him whenever he denied such things and told her they were just having a good time.

When he’d told her they hadn’t even said they were ‘exclusive’, she’d just given him this look and said, “But I bet you haven’t been with anyone else, and I bet he hasn’t either,” like that was supposed to _mean_ something.

So yeah, he loved Vic, but he needed to get back into his own place.

“I’m going to get a shower and then head over to check it out,” Robert said.

“Great,” Aaron replied before taking another long sip from his mug. He clearly wasn’t quite fully functioning yet.

“What time are you on ‘til later?” Robert asked.

“I’m on nine ‘til seven again today,” Aaron replied around a yawn.

“Do you wanna come over after your shift then? As long as I’ve moved back in obviously. Inspect the place. We’ll get a takeaway or something.”

“Sounds good,” Aaron smiled at him. He was just about finished his brew so Robert knew he was just about ready to face the day.

“Why don’t we make the most of my lazy start to the morning and head for a shower?” he suggested as he leaned over, kissing Aaron as he lifted the mug out of his hand and placed it on the bedside table. 

Aaron ma y not have been much of a talker first thing in the morning, but he was always reacted well to morning sex, or morning kisses, or morning blow jobs. He followed Robert as he pulled away, chasing his lips as he leant forward in bed, not worrying about the cold anymore as the duvet slipped down his chest to drop onto his lap.

Robert pressed a few quick pecks to his lips as he continued moving backwards. This, he’d found, was a proven method of getting Aaron out of bed.

“ _Rob_ ,” Aaron groaned as Robert moved further out of his grasp.

“Come on.” Robert looked at him with a little smile on his face. “We both need a shower anyway, you need to get up so you actually make it into work on time, and if you get up now I’ll have time to give you a blow job.” With that, he turned around and wandered across the landing and into the bathroom. He knew that Aaron would be right behind him within seconds.

***   

The inspection of his flat went well and Robert was absolutely thrilled to be able to move back in as soon as he was ready. As soon as he was ready meant immediately, and he wasted no time in driving over to Vic’s, collecting his belongings and quickly moving them back into their correct places in his flat.

The contractors had done a great job: the kitchen was as good as new, better in fact. There was no sign of there ever having been a fire, at all. The rest of the flat was bright and clean, not a mark on the walls or any lingering odour of smoke.

It took the whole morning and into the afternoon to collect his stuff and move it back in. Then he called into work for a few hours before heading back to the flat to enjoy the feeling of being back in his own space. He had to admit that it actually felt a little quiet after the weeks he’d spent living at Vic’s or staying at Aaron’s. Not that either of them were particularly noisy or anything; it was just nice to have the company, he supposed. But he’d soon get used to being on his own again – not that he would be alone all the time. Aaron would no doubt be staying over every once in a while.

It was nearly half-eight when Aaron eventually made it over, and Robert was more than a little pleased to see him. He told himself that it was just because he was so keen to show off his newly repaired flat and that he was looking forward to having Aaron at his place for the first time, instead of always feeling like he was in other people’s space.

They ordered a Chinese takeaway and spent the time waiting for it having a ‘tour’ and then sitting down with a beer to watch part of the Manchester United game on the telly, which neither of them were particularly interested in. After they’d eaten their meal, Robert gathered up their plates and led Aaron back into the kitchen to start clearing up. As Robert washed up, Aaron perched himself on the kitchen counter beside the sink and watched him.

“You know, you could dry up, if you’re bored,” Robert told him.

“Hmm, I could,” Aaron replied. “But I’d rather sit here and observe you at work – check you’re doing it properly. I do like a man who knows how to wash-up in the correct order, you know.”

Robert looked at him doubtfully. “The correct order?”

“Yeah, ya know, glasses first, then plates…” He was waving his hand around as he spoke and Robert couldn’t help but smile at him. He was truly ridiculous sometimes, but also so sweet.

“You’re an idiot,” he remarked with a smile as he finished up with the last pieces of cutlery.

“Ah yes, but an idiot who knows correct washing up etiquette, so I’m quite the catch, I’ll have you know,” he laughed.

Robert dried his hands, threw the tea-towel onto the side and stepped closer to Aaron. He moved into the space between Aaron’s parted thighs as he still sat on the kitchen worktop. Running his hands up Aaron’s thighs, he smirked to himself at the little intake of breath that Aaron took but tried to disguise. He really enjoyed knowing he could have that effect on him with the simplest of touches.

“Someday you’ll make someone a wonderful husband with all of that knowledge, I’m sure, but right now, I’d rather shag you than have you educating me on the bloody washing up.”

Aaron laughed brightly and shuffled forwards on the counter as if to climb down, but Robert stopped him with his large hands holding onto his thighs.

“Where are you going?” he asked as he leant in to press his lips against Aaron’s neck.

As was his usual reaction, Robert had quickly learnt, Aaron gasped slightly at the sensation before threading the fingers of one hand into the hair at the back of Robert’s head.

“I was,” he gasped again as Robert bit down on his neck lightly, “getting down so we could go and get on with the shagging.”

Pulling away so he could look into his eyes, Robert smirked. “Who says we can’t get on with it right here?” He slid his hands behind Aaron’s arse and dragged him a little closer to the edge so his already hard cock was pressing against Robert’s stomach through his clothes.

“As in, right here?” Aaron asked with a smirk of his own on his face.

“I feel that it’s important that we do,” Robert confirmed, with mock seriousness. “After all, this is technically where we first met.”

Aaron laughed again and Robert grinned, pleased with himself that he had yet again made the other man happy.

“And you had the cheek to call _me_ an idiot,” Aaron said, before he pulled Robert closer and kissed him deeply.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the lovely feedback I've received so far for this story. This has been my favourite chapter to write so far, so I hope you all enjoy it. As always, feedback makes me write faster!

Aaron really hated stuff like this. He hated all the smiling and shaking hands and pretending to be interested in small talk. He just wasn’t cut out for that sort of thing and it made him so uncomfortable. He couldn’t believe his watch manager had forced him to do it. He was on shift for Christ’s sake and, instead of being with the rest of his crew mates, he was stuck in a fancy function suite at a hotel in the city centre, having to plaster a fake smile onto his face anytime someone approached him. He was actually wishing for a massive call-out to come through on his radio so he could escape – that’s how desperate he was.

It wasn’t the purpose of the event that was the problem. It was a silent auction charity evening set up to raise money for a local charity that supported children that had cancer and their families. Aaron was more than supportive of the good cause – it was just the having to pretend he was comfortable around all these posh businessmen and women that he didn’t enjoy.

When he’d arrived for his shift earlier on in the evening, his boss had immediately gathered the whole crew together and told them that they were drawing straws for who would have to attend the event. And he’d meant literally. Each member of the team had had to pull a straw from his fist and Aaron had drawn the short straw, much to Adam’s amusement, alongside his cousin, Debbie, who worked the same watch as him.

Debbie hadn’t minded being told to attend, in fact she’d been quite pleased, and probably would have volunteered anyway seeing as her own daughter was suffering a serious illness. She’d disappeared off into the crowd as soon as they’d arrived in the conference suite at the hotel and left Aaron all alone trying to avoid eye contact with random wealthy people who wanted to chat to him and congratulate him on his ‘marvellous’, ‘heroic’ career.

Aaron had shaken a lot of hands since arriving and was now standing in the corner hoping to stay unnoticed for a while as he sipped on his glass of lemonade (he was on duty after all). He scanned the room, observing all of the people schmoozing before his eyes landed on the back of a head that he recognised. The man was dressed in a well-fitting dark navy suit and Aaron knew those broad shoulders, he knew what the muscles of that back looked like, he knew the blond hair at the back of the man’s head. It was Robert.

He hadn’t seen Robert for a few days; a combination of his shifts and Robert being particularly busy at work had meant that they hadn’t had time to get together. Aaron was pleased to see him now. He’d had no idea that the other man was attending the event and obviously Robert wouldn’t be expecting Aaron to be present seeing as _Aaron_ hadn’t even known he’d be there until a few hours ago.  He wondered how close he could get to Robert before the other man noticed him. The idea of surprising him made Aaron smile to himself and he moved away from his position in the corner slightly to begin his stealthy approach.           

After a few paces in Robert’s direction, he came to a halt. Robert hadn’t noticed him, he was still almost completely facing away from Aaron, but he looked to be well and truly absorbed in the conversation he was having.

A beautiful woman wearing a figure-hugging, cleavage-revealing dress was chatting animatedly with Robert. She was laughing brightly at whatever he was saying to her and every so often she would lean closer and gently touch his arm. From where he was standing, Aaron could see that Robert was having an equally good time flirting with the woman if the wide smile on his face was anything to go by. The woman sipped from a champagne flute delicately and her eyes sparkled as Robert leant closer and spoke quietly into her ear.

Aaron had no idea where it came from, but suddenly he felt a hot wave flash through his entire body. His stomach flipped over and he felt his jaw clenching in anger. No, not anger, _jealousy_. For a moment he contemplated marching over to them and yanking Robert away, yelling at him, asking him what the hell he thought he was playing at, but then he shook his head to rid himself of such thoughts. Robert wasn’t _his_ ; he didn’t have the right to do that. They’d never made any sort of commitment to one another. He wasn’t even sure where the flash of jealousy had come from but he had to push it out of his mind because he really had no other option.

He’d known that Robert was bisexual from fairly early on in their encounters after a drunken conversation about some of their dating and relationship disasters, and it hadn’t particularly bothered him. He wasn’t bothered that Robert was flirting with a woman now. That wasn’t the issue. It was that Robert was flirting with anyone at all. ‘ _Shit, get a grip_ ,’ Aaron told himself firmly.

He was about to disappear back to his corner, or perhaps find Debbie and make up some bullshit story so he could head back to the fire station, when Robert suddenly turned his head in his direction and their eyes met. There was the merest flicker of surprise on Robert’s face but he recovered from it so smoothly that the woman standing opposite didn’t even notice when he turned back to face her.

For a moment Aaron thought that was all he was going to get: Robert had seen him and dismissed him just as quickly. But to Aaron’s shock, and pleasure, Robert seemed to quickly wrap up his conversation with the woman, as politely as he could, and then turned to Aaron and made his way towards him. 

He smirked knowingly at Aaron as he approached him without any sort of hesitance, looking as charming and cocky as he had those first few times they’d met up in the pub. His eyes slowly trailed up Aaron’s body as he wandered closer and when they made eye contact again, Aaron could see the desire that had ignited in his eyes.  

“Fancy seeing you here,” Robert remarked casually when he finally stood in front of Aaron.

“Fancy,” Aaron grunted. He was still feeling a little riled by the sight of Robert with that woman and he couldn’t quite bring himself to greet Robert with a smile.

“I didn’t know you were coming to this,” Robert said.

“Neither did I,” Aaron replied bluntly. Robert looked at him questioningly, so Aaron continued. “I drew the short straw. I’m here to represent the station. We donated a visit to the fire station for some kids and my boss made me come.”

“And I can tell you’re just thrilled to be here,” Robert quipped. “I was worried when I saw you. I thought that maybe one of the lots was a ‘date with a fireman’ and I was planning how I was going to outbid some pervy old guy who wanted to take you out.” He was grinning brightly at Aaron as he joked with him.

Aaron huffed out a little laugh at Robert’s comments. No matter his earlier jealousy, he just couldn’t seem to stay mad at the idiot standing before him. “Well, to be honest, you’re as old as I’d be willing to go, really. I mean, I sometimes worry about _your_ back so there’s no risk of me going off with an even older bloke.”

A loud laugh erupted from Robert. “You cheeky sod,” he exclaimed. His eyes were dancing with pleasure at their playful banter and Aaron could tell that the other man would like nothing more than to drag him off to the loos to have his way with him. But Aaron was at work and it looked like Robert probably was too, so any such activities would have to wait, no matter how much he wanted Robert.

“What are you doing here anyway?” Aaron asked and he just couldn’t seem to stop himself adding, “Who was that you were chatting up?” He cursed himself for asking; he just couldn’t resist. He knew that Robert would immediately think he was jealous, not that he would be wrong, but he didn’t want to be that sort of bloke and he didn’t want Robert to think he was being weird about it.

“That was Chrissie White, the daughter of one of our potential, very lucrative clients. Our company has donated two season tickets for Leeds United for the auction, so my boss wanted someone to come along and be the face of the business. It looks good to potential clients that we’re generous, thinking of the community, that sort of thing,” Robert told him as he waved his hand around.

Aaron found himself smiling a little at Robert’s explanation, hoping that this ‘Chrissie’ woman was merely another way for Robert to progress his career and nothing more. He couldn’t quite figure out why it mattered so much, but he was pleased. “Ah, so is this some sort of ‘speculate to accumulate’ thing?” he asked.

Something flickered across Robert’s expression at Aaron’s words. “Something like that,” he said and his voice seemed to have dropped a little. “You should keep talking money - it turns me on.”

Aaron’s eyes widened slightly at his comment and he felt his cheeks heat. Robert suddenly stepped closer and held out his hand for Aaron to shake almost like they were business acquaintances. Aaron was struggling to keep up with how the conversation had moved but he grasped Robert’s hand on impulse. Robert used their joined hands to tug Aaron a little closer and he patted him on the back soundly.

“You’re coming over to mine after your shift, right?” he said in the same low voice.

“I don’t get off ‘til seven,” Aaron replied, his own voice sounding more husky than it had before.

“I don’t care,” Robert told him. “Come over. And keep your uniform on – I want you to fuck me while you’re wearing it.”

With that, he pressed something into Aaron’s hand and released his grip. He walked away and began mingling with the crowd as though he hadn’t just left Aaron with a semi.

Aaron just gaped after him for a few long moments before he realised he was holding something in his hand. He looked down and realised it was a key – the key to Robert’s flat.

***

His shift had felt like the longest of his life. The combination of the couple of tedious hours spent at the charity event (apart from the minutes spent with Robert) and the knowledge that Robert was waiting for him to get round there, meant that his shift dragged by incredibly slowly. When seven AM finally arrived, he practically ran out of the station to his car and headed straight over to Robert’s flat.

When he arrived at Robert’s building, he parked up and jogged up the stairs. He was far too restless to wait for the lift. Robert’s teasing words had left him wound up for the remainder of his shift and as much as he was tempted to make Robert wait in the same way that he’d been left desperately wanting all night, he was more keen to actually get into the flat and do exactly what Robert had requested. The smug git. He knew exactly the affect his words would have on Aaron and he knew full well that there was nothing that Aaron could do about it while he was at work.

He was half-tempted to barge into the flat making a racket, knowing that Robert would still be asleep seeing as he didn’t have to get up yet, but he preferred the idea of sliding into Robert’s bed and having the other man wake up to find him right there beside him. He kind of liked Robert when he was just waking up. Well, he liked him in a lot of ways, a lot of the time, (not that he’d admit that to anyone – even himself, really) but there was something soft and sweet about Robert when he was just stirring from sleep. Most of the time, Robert awoke before Aaron when they stayed over at each other’s places but, every so often, Aaron had woken up first and watched as Robert blinked awake slowly, his face all soft and adorably marked with pillow crease-marks. He supposed adorableness wasn’t what he was particularly interested in that morning though – more like waking Robert up and then using the pent up sexual tension he’d been feeling since the charity event.    

Quietly pushing the door of the flat closed after he’d entered, he slipped off his boots and padded towards Robert’s bedroom. The door was ajar and he pushed it open carefully to avoid any squeaks that might give him away. He peered into the room, letting his eyes adjust to the gloom. The sun had only just started to rise and there was no other light in the room, but Aaron could make out the shape of Robert curled beneath the thick duvet on his bed. Stepping further into the room he briefly considered stripping out of his clothes, but Robert had been quite adamant about him staying in his work uniform.

When he had arrived at the charity event last night, he had felt like a bit of a scruff standing there in his navy work tshirt and fleece with his technical trousers on amongst all of the women in fancy ball gowns and men in their suits or tuxedos. He hadn’t even been able to wear his dress uniform seeing as he was on duty and could have potentially been called away to a fire at any moment. He’d felt even more out of place when he’d caught sight of Robert looking just like a bloody model in his tailored suit. But the fact that Robert seemed to very much enjoy seeing him in his work attire, so much so that he wanted him to keep it on, had quickly erased any self-consciousness from Aaron’s mind. Knowing that Robert was turned on by him wearing it caused heat to race up Aaron’s spine. If he fulfilled Robert’s desire this morning and actually fucked him whilst he was still in his uniform, he was pretty sure that getting dressed for a shift was never going to be the same again.

Stepping up to the end of the bed, he could see that Robert was sound asleep, his face smushed into his bedding, his bare shoulders visible as his arms disappeared beneath his pillow. Aaron wondered how Robert ever managed to share a bed with him seeing as he seemed to be quite content to be sprawled across the middle of his mattress this morning. Then he smiled to himself; he liked the idea of Robert making space for him.

He was a little concerned that this idea of slipping into bed with Robert was going to backfire. What if Robert woke up, startled by the feeling of someone climbing into bed with him, and punched Aaron in the face? Although, Aaron reasoned to himself, he’d seen Robert when he’d just woken up and a co-ordinated attack was not something he would probably be capable of. Aaron could easily overpower him – which was an interesting idea in itself, he supposed.

Eventually, he decided that he’d done enough thinking and placed a knee onto the mattress. He carefully climbed up and tried to avoid kneeling on one of Robert’s long legs as he moved up the bed until he was hovering over Robert’s form on his hands and knees. His hands were on either side of Robert’s head and he lowered himself down to nose at the hair on the side of his head before he started to place gentle kisses to the delicate skin behind Robert’s ear.

Robert came awake gradually, his head seeming to move without any conscious decision on Robert’s part to allow Aaron further access to his skin. Aaron ran his tongue down the shell of Robert’s ear and watched as a slow, sleepy smile pulled at Robert’s lips. His arms shifted beneath his pillow as he stretched a little. He smiled against his pillow as he moaned in contentment and Aaron was really glad he’d decided to do this.

“Good morning,” he murmured against Robert’s ear.

Robert hummed in agreement. “You smell smoky,” he replied, his voice sleep-rough and sexy as hell to Aaron.

“That’s what happens when you tell me to come over here in my uniform,” Aaron told him as he started to push the duvet down Robert’s back as his hand stroked across his skin. The sight of goose-bumps raising on Robert’s flesh where his fingers travelled was mesmerising.

Robert’s eyes opened a little wider so that he could try to get a better look at Aaron in the still gloomy bedroom. “You kept it on?” he asked quietly.

Aaron kissed his shoulder blade. “Of course. You asked me to.”

His fingers continued on their journey across Robert’s back, tracing the muscles and following the ridges of his spine down towards his arse. When he got to the base of Robert’s spine, his fingers continued further, between his arse cheeks and down, and then suddenly he stopped at the slickness he’d found. He looked up at Robert’s face and saw him peering back at him with a knowing look and heat in his eyes.

“I couldn’t wait,” Robert explained, his head now pillowed on his arms as looked down the bed at Aaron. “After seeing you at the auction, I came home and I couldn’t stop thinking about you.”

Aaron swallowed thickly at Robert’s words, his fingers still at the cleft of his arse.

“I kept thinking about your big cock filling me up. And I couldn’t wait,” Robert repeated. “So I got myself ready for you.”

“ _Shit_ …Rob,” Aaron groaned. His own cock was rock hard in his work trousers now. The image of Robert fingering himself open to prepare himself for Aaron was driving him wild. He really wished he’d been there to see it. Dipping his fingers lower, he pushed one easily past the ring of muscle into Robert’s already lubed opening. Robert groaned deeply and he pushed back against Aaron’s finger greedily. He slipped a second finger in causing yet another groan to fall from Robert’s lips. “Did you come?” Aaron asked as he thrust his fingers into Robert.

The other man was rocking back against his hand seeking his own pleasure, but Aaron stilled his fingers. “Did you come?” he asked again.

“Yes,” Robert admitted, he was still rolling his hips against Aaron’s hand and Aaron nearly groaned at the thought of Robert coming all over himself. “I was imagining you were here fucking me, but it wasn’t the same. I want you to fuck me, Aaron. Come on.”

Aaron was assaulted by images of Robert writhing around in his bed, fingers up his arse, wanking himself to ecstasy as he imagined Aaron slamming into him, and he felt like he could come just from the idea of it. He pulled his fingers away, clearly Robert didn’t need any more preparation, and leaned over Robert’s body to reach into his nightstand and grab the pack of condoms and bottle of lube he kept in there. He moved back behind Robert and reached for the hem of his t-shirt to take it off but Robert reached up and stopped him.

“Don’t take it off,” he said with a smirk on his face. “I told you I wanted you to fuck me in your uniform. You have to leave it on.”

Aaron rolled his eyes slightly, wondering if he’d ever say no to Robert, but he left the t-shirt in place. He quickly unzipped his thick work trousers and pushed them down his thighs, along with his boxers, but left them bunched at his knees. He was going to be absolutely boiling when this was over, but it would be worth it, he was sure.

Not willing to waste any more time, he rolled the condom on and quickly squeezed out some lube to coat it, before he pulled Robert up by his hips and lined himself up. He pressed forward slowly so just the tip of his cock was against Robert’s hole, but Robert clearly wasn’t willing to wait or be teased. He tried to push back against Aaron, but Aaron held him firmly by the hips.

“Slow down,” Aaron said, before he leant forward to kiss his way down Robert’s back. “You’ve already got your way, now it’s my turn or you can go back to your fingers.”

Robert actually shuddered at the words, but he stilled his rocking and waited for Aaron to move.

Aaron grasped the base of his cock and slowly moved into Robert. He could almost feel Robert’s effort to hold himself still. He pushed forward until his thighs were pressed against Robert’s. They were both panting by the time Aaron had bottomed out and the temptation to pull out and slam back into Robert was almost overwhelming, but Aaron wanted to take his time this morning. If Robert was going to tease him by whispering filthy suggestions in his ear and then leave him to work the remainder of his shift with a hard-on, he was going to make him wait for what he was so clearly desperate to have.

Aaron remained still for as long as he could bear it and was amazed by Robert’s obedience as he stayed on his hands and knees, his back arched, but not moving to chase his own pleasure. Eventually, Aaron pulled out slowly and then equally slowly he pushed forward again. He started a slow drag in and out of Robert, wanting to draw out the sensation of being inside Robert for as long as he could. One hand reached around and squeezed at Robert’s balls before he stroked his length a few times before returning to its position on Robert’s hip. A quiet whine slipped from Robert’s lips but he didn’t complain, much to Aaron’s amusement. He must have been worried that Aaron would really deliver on his threat when in reality there was no way that Aaron would be able to stop fucking him now.

Gradually, Aaron began to build the pace of his movements. He had savoured the slow slide into Robert’s warmth, but he knew he couldn’t go on like that for long. He needed more, just like Robert did. He squeezed at Robert’s hips, adjusting his fingers on sweat-dampened skin before he moved back inside him more forcefully. Robert actually groaned at the first stroke and suddenly the silence that he’d managed to maintain was lost as he grunted and moaned at each thrust of Aaron’s cock.

The pace built after that. Robert’s fingers were curling in the duvet as Aaron slammed into him and Aaron’s fingers were leaving white marks imprinted on Robert’s hips as he held onto him.

“Did you imagine it like this?” Aaron asked him between grunts and dragging in gasps of air. “Did you come thinking of me pounding into you?”

“ _God_ …yes, Aaron… _yes_ ,” Robert panted out. “I wanted you so much.”

“You’ve got me now,” Aaron told him raggedly, sweat dripping down his face. “Touch yourself,” he commanded. He wasn’t even sure where it had come from, but the thought of Robert getting himself off seemed to drive him wild.

Robert obliged instantly. He lifted one hand from the mattress and began stripping at his dick in firm strokes. He was moaning and swearing and yelling Aaron’s name every time Aaron’s cock grazed against his prostate and Aaron could not tear his eyes away from the way his body arched into each touch and the muscles in his back moved as he took everything that was given to him.

Robert’s orgasm seemed to strike him suddenly. His whole body shuddered, Aaron felt his arse clench around his cock, and Robert cried out as he spilled into his fist and onto the duvet. He was quivering with aftershocks as Aaron continued to pound into him, chasing his own release. Robert was still clenching around him, but he was struggling to stay upright as his arms shook. Aaron leant over his back, causing Robert to moan out, beginning to feel over-sensitive now the rush of his orgasm was fading, and kissed Robert deeply, before slamming into Robert once more and feeling his own cock pulse as his orgasm hit. He closed his eyes, riding the sensation, his hips still twitching forwards into Robert, before he stilled completely and promptly collapsed against Robert’s back.

They both went tumbling onto the bed and then immediately started laughing. When they’d calmed down and caught their breath, Robert rolled on to his side and slid his fingers beneath Aaron’s sweat-soaked t-shirt.

“That was worth the wait,” he declared with his cocky smile back in place.

Aaron scoffed before sitting up a little to drag the t-shirt over his head and then push his trousers and boxers down completely. All of his clothes were thrown over the side of the bed and he lay in a star shape trying to cool down. “Some of us had to actually work instead of coming back here and spending the evening wanking, you know,” he said in mock irritation.

“Ah, but it was all for your benefit,” Robert told him as his fingers traced patterns over Aaron’s chest.

Aaron laughed again at that. “Of course it was, Rob. Just you keep telling yourself that. I’m sure you got absolutely nothing out of it.”

Robert’s reply was cut off by the alarm on his phone going off, signalling that it was time for him to get up and get ready for work. He sighed grumpily and looked down at Aaron. “I’ve got to get a shower,” he said. “Stay here.” He pressed a kiss to Aaron’s forehead and climbed out of the bed.

Aaron lay awake listening to the shower running for a bit, but his body was so used to his shift pattern that it decided that seeing as he was in bed after his night shift, it must be time for sleep. He felt his eyelids drooping and tried to force himself to stay awake, but he knew it was a losing battle. Robert would wake him up before he left for work and then he could head home and get some sleep.

***

When Aaron woke up, everywhere was quiet. The shower wasn’t running anymore and there were no sounds of Robert making a cup of coffee in the kitchen.

He ran his hand across his face sleepily and yawned. He felt like he’d slept really deeply and really well, but that couldn’t be right.

“Robert?” he called out, but got no response.

He rolled over, bunching up the duvet around him as he moved. When did he get covered up? The last thing he remembered was being too hot so he was lying naked on the bed. He was still naked under the covers.

His phone was on the nightstand and he pressed the home button to see that it was half three in the afternoon. And there was a message on his phone from Robert. He sat up a little and swiped his phone to life so he could read it.

_You were asleep when I got out of the shower and you looked so cute that I didn’t want to wake you_ , it started. Aaron wrinkled his nose at being described as ‘cute’. _Stay as long as you want and if you’re still there when I get in I’ll make us something for tea. And you might as well keep the key to my flat. You can let yourself in whenever you like so we can have a repeat of this morning ;)_

Aaron grinned to himself as he read the message again. Then he burrowed himself down under the covers, content to stay exactly where he was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm snarfettelove on tumblr.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I told you that feedback makes me write faster! Voila - here's the next chapter for you! Thanks so much for all the lovely feedback so far - you guys are the best! 
> 
> A lot of you that have commented so far have said that you can see how they're both completely oblivious to what's actually developing between them and you're right. There may be some slightly more angsty stuff ahead as 'feelings' start to get involved, but I'm hoping to keep things light where possible (for now!).

Robert had been humming ‘ _Holding out for a Hero’_ by Bonnie Tyler since Aaron had arrived at his flat after his shift. He knew exactly what he was doing and was just waiting for some response from Aaron. He kept glancing over at the other man as he prepared the stir fry for their tea, watching for the moment when Aaron would snap and call him out on his ridiculous humming. And then, he’d attack.

Aaron did keep giving him looks as if to say ‘what the hell has gotten into you tonight,’ but Robert merely grinned at him and carried on humming. It was even getting on his own nerves now, but he was going to see his plan out.

Eventually, Aaron huffed out a sigh and turned to face Robert with narrowed eyes. “Alright,” he said firmly, “spit it out. I can tell you’re dying to say something and all this humming has got be leading to something that you’re clearly bursting to get off your chest.”

Trying to look innocent wasn’t easy for Robert, but he turned to Aaron with his best ‘I have no idea what you mean’ look on his face. “I didn’t know you weren’t a fan of the classics,” he said in mock offence. “Maybe you’d prefer ‘ _My Hero’_ by the Foo Fighters?” And with that, he started singing at Aaron. “ _There goes my hero, Watch him as he goes…”_ He was pointing at Aaron and laughing as he shimmied his way around him in the kitchen; Aaron watching him in bewilderment the whole time.

“Alright, smart arse,” Aaron said after a few moments of just blinking in confusion at Robert’s antics. “You’ve obviously got something hilarious you want to laugh at me about, or you’ve been drinking all day, and knowing you, I’m going for the first option, so hit me.”

Robert grinned at him again before grabbing a folded up newspaper from down the side of the microwave. He’d shoved it down there when he got home after picking it up on the train. He wasn’t one for reading the local newspapers – it was hardly ground-breaking journalism covering the major news stories of the world - but when he’d got on the train back from his meeting earlier in the day someone had left the paper on the table in front of his seat. Instead of firing up his laptop like normal, he’d decided to flick through the paper. Nothing had particularly caught his interest until he turned yet another page and was confronted by a picture that had made him burst out laughing.

Robert flipped through the pages and then proudly turned it around for Aaron to see. As soon as Aaron’s eyes landed on the article, he shook his head and sighed dramatically.

“Oh, for fuck’s sake,” he grumbled as he tried to snatch the paper out of Robert’s hands.

Robert was too quick though and immediately pulled it out of Aaron’s grasp. “Oi! Be careful. I want to keep this so I can cut it out and frame it. You’re famous!” he exclaimed. “My hero!” He made a kissy face at Aaron and then at the picture of him in the paper.

“You’re a fucking idiot,” Aaron told him grumpily.

“Rude,” Robert stated with a mock frown. “Why shouldn’t I be proud of you? You _are_ a hero – the paper says so. You saved poor Tigger from a fate worse than death, being stuck up in a tree forever taunted by pigeons, and his owner, a Mrs Angela Henderson, 49, praised the heroic actions of the fire brigade, particularly you Fireman Dingle, in rescuing the poor feline.” Robert was having a brilliant time as he quoted parts of the report and added in his own details.

Aaron finally managed to grab the paper out of his hands and stared down at the article with such a sulky look on his face that Robert almost stopped winding him up.

“We weren’t even there for that. We’d had a call-out to a wheelie-bin fire and then that bloody woman just collared us on our way back to the truck so we could hardly say no. How the fuck did they even get the pictures?” Aaron was grumbling as he looked down at the pictures of himself, one half-way down the tree with Tigger in his arms, and one as he’d reached the bottom handing the damn cat over to its owner.

“I’d guess someone with a smart phone,” Robert told him. “You know everything gets caught on camera these days and the arrival of a fire engine and the appearance of some hunky firemen was bound to attract attention. Besides, it’s all good PR, you know.”

Aaron scrunched up his face at Robert’s words and then threw the paper onto the dining table. Mrs Henderson’s face smushed alongside Tigger’s in the main picture still beaming up at him.

Robert closed the gap between them and placed his hands on Aaron’s hips. “You know, you really are a hero,” he said as he looked down at him.

“Give over,” Aaron said as he rolled his eyes. He looked so uncomfortable under the praise and he wouldn’t meet Robert’s eyes.

Robert couldn’t tell if he still thought that he was mocking him or if he genuinely couldn’t accept what Robert was telling him. He pressed his lips to Aaron’s cheek and slowly kissed his way along to Aaron’s mouth, using the fingers of one hand to gently lift his chin so he could kiss him properly. He felt something tender as he looked down at Aaron’s slightly flushed face.

With their faces so close, Robert could see the different shades of blue that made up Aaron’s bright eyes. “Hey,” he said as he cupped Aaron’s cheek. “I know I was winding you up, but I really am proud of you. You’re very brave. Not everyone could do what you do every shift.”

Aaron huffed out a little laugh, leaving Robert wondering whether he’d actually believed him. “What? You mean, saving cats from trees?” he asked.

“No. You know what I mean.” Robert kissed him again, pressing him back against the kitchen counter and grinding their hips together in an attempt to lighten the mood again.

Aaron had been kissing him back quite happily, but he suddenly pulled back slightly and his eyes slid sideways to look in the direction of the oven. “You know, I might have to go into firefighter mode if you don’t turn off that hob.”

Quickly realising that he’d forgotten all about the stir fry that was cooking, Robert immediately moved to turn the heat off. He turned back to Aaron sheepishly.

“Looks like you’ve got a bit of a bad habit there,” Aaron remarked with a raised eyebrow.

Robert shrugged apologetically, not wanting Aaron to actually give him a lecture about fire safety in the kitchen.

“I might start worrying that you did it on purpose, just so you can see me action again,” Aaron teased.

Rolling his eyes, Robert turned back to the hob to check on the state of their meal, hoping it wouldn’t be ruined. He couldn’t actually smell burnt food so he hoped it wasn’t too late. “Yeah, yeah,” he nodded along with Aaron’s comments. “Whatever. I’d rather you stuck to saving cats than running into burning buildings,” he said casually, not really thinking about his words until Aaron put a hand on his arm and turned him round.

“What d’you mean by that?” he asked as he looked at Robert quizzically.

Suddenly feeling extremely exposed, Robert just shrugged and tried to plaster an easy smile onto his face. It felt wrong, it felt false, and he was sure that Aaron would be able to see through it. “Nothing,” he said trying to sound casual, “I didn’t mean anything.”

Aaron eyed him critically, clearly sensing that their conversation had suddenly transitioned from their usual teasing banter to something else entirely more serious. “Rob…you…it was a bit of a weird thing to say if you didn’t mean anything, though,” Aaron stumbled over his words as he tried to get to the bottom of what was happening.

Robert could feel something like panic bubbling inside his stomach. He hadn’t meant to say it out loud – it had just slipped out. But he meant it. The idea of Aaron tackling dangerous fires day in, day out, had started to freak him out. And he didn’t know why. No wait - that was a lie that he kept telling himself. Of course he knew why.

Losing his mum in a fire had been the most traumatic thing that had ever happened to Robert. He still had nightmares about it every so often and he’d been to counselling as a teenager to help him start to process his emotions about what had happened. But he’d never got over it – not really. How could he?

And now, he was terrified that the same thing was going to happen to Aaron. He knew that it was Aaron’s job and he understood that Aaron went into a fire with all the right equipment and he was trained to know what to do, but _what if_?

Robert had been struggling with the fact that he felt more for Aaron than he could even admit to himself. Every time he so much as thought about making his ‘relationship’ with Aaron something more, he forced the idea out of his head. He didn’t do serious, they hadn’t started this with the idea of it ever becoming anything more, Aaron was his friend and he’d lose him if he suggested that they became anything else: he had so many arguments in his head about why he couldn’t tell Aaron the truth. And he was forcing himself to stick to it, so much so that he just confused himself every time he even started to think about it. Avoiding thinking about it was the best plan, he’d decided.

And there was absolutely no way that he was going to tell Aaron about what had happened to his mum. That was too personal, too much detail for the sort of relationship that they had. They were friends who fucked, not shoulders to cry on. Aaron wouldn’t want to know about it. He’d think Robert was being dramatic and projecting his fears about fire just because Aaron was a fireman.

Robert was shaken from his racing thoughts by Aaron speaking again. “You do know it’s all part of my job, right?” he asked, and it was so obvious that he was trying to keep things light.

And Robert knew for sure in that moment, that Aaron wasn’t interested in anything deeper than being mates and shagging, because he clearly didn’t want to have some heart-to-heart about how Robert felt or Robert’s fears about what might happen. He obviously didn’t want to hear about how Robert was scared of losing him.

He plastered on his brightest grin and rolled his eyes dramatically again. “Ha, ha,” he said. “You know, you should be a comedian.” He was working hard to pull the conversation back from anything serious. He just wanted to forget it – he was never going to voice his feelings about any of this to Aaron. “I just meant I don’t get how you can want to go running into a burning building, when most sane people are running _out_ of it.”

Aaron was still watching him thoughtfully. “Someone’s gotta do it.” he replied easily.

And while that answer did nothing to make Robert feel any better, that was the end of the conversation. Thankfully Aaron seemed willing to drop it and Robert quickly drew his attention back to their slightly overcooked stir fry.

Robert refused to think about it as he looked at Aaron across his little dining table and he refused to think about it as he lay awake in bed that night too.

***

Christmas had been quiet.

Robert had spent the ‘big day’ with his sister and their step-mother, while Aaron had been on shift and then spent the rest of the festive season being ‘smothered’ (as he described it) by his well-meaning but intense family.

They’d said they wouldn’t do presents for one another because that wasn’t the sort of thing that they did, obviously. But when they’d met up the day before Christmas Eve, they’d both presented each other with a gift, and then laughed at one another because they were so daft.

Fortunately neither of them had gone for anything serious.

It was obvious that Robert was dying for Aaron to unwrap his present if the smile splitting his face was anything to go by. Aaron had pulled the gift from the bag to find a grey t-shirt with one of the photos of himself from that stupid newspaper article about the cat enlarged on the front. Underneath the picture, the words ‘Not All Heroes Wear Capes’ were printed. Robert had exploded into hysterical laughter as Aaron held the t-shirt up to his chest and rolled his eyes at Robert’s ridiculousness.

Then it had been Robert’s turn and he’d eagerly ripped the garish wrapping paper off his present to reveal a 2018 firefighters calendar. Aaron had simply raised his eyebrows and smirked at Robert who was examining his gift. He’d turned it over immediately to check each month but then frowned. “I have to say I’m a bit disappointed – I thought you were supposed to be Mr. April,” he’d laughed and then told Aaron that he was going to print a photo of him to stick over the current, sub-par Mr. April’s head.

They hadn’t seen much of each other over the festive period after that, but they’d made plans to see each other in the new year. And Robert had made plans for Aaron’s birthday.

Robert liked to think he was pretty cunning and he’d figured out when Aaron’s birthday was without having to ask him. Knowing Aaron like he did, he got the feeling that the other man wouldn’t want a fuss over his birthday but he still wanted to do something nice for him. He worked out Aaron’s shift pattern and knew that he was on a day shift on his birthday which meant he could ask him to come over after that. Coming over in the evening after his shift was nothing out of the ordinary so Robert knew he’d be able to surprise him with a home-cooked meal, some dramatic action movie (probably involving fast cars) and then an amazing round of birthday shagging. The perfect plan.

Even when Aaron told him that he’d be popping to the pub after his shift with his crew mates, that didn’t matter. There was still plenty of time for what Robert had planned.

He got away from work an hour early so he had time to go and buy what he needed for their meal as well as some beers, and then headed home to start getting everything ready.

Eight o’clock came and went and Robert was waiting patiently for Aaron to arrive. He wasn’t expecting him until after eight anyway so he was hoping any time now he’d hear the tell-tale sound of Aaron’s key scraping in the lock and him kicking his boots off in the hallway. It was amazing how used to it Robert was even though he’d only given the other man the key a few weeks ago.

He pottered about in the kitchen, checking on the food every now and again, tidying up, and trying his best not to keep checking the time. Another hour rolled by and there was still no sign of Aaron. Robert checked his phone and found no sign of communication from him but he wasn’t ready to give up yet.

At ten o’clock, he was starting to the think that he might have to face up to the fact that Aaron wasn’t going to make it for dinner. The food was completely ruined and he tried hard not to feel too disappointed that he’d spent so much time over it as he scraped it all into the bin and chucked the pots into the sink. He couldn’t even contemplate washing it all up now – it felt too much like admitting defeat. And it felt like a kick in the teeth.

This was exactly why anything more than ‘friends with benefits’ was a bad idea. If you tried too hard, made too much effort, let your heart start making decisions and plans, you just ended up disappointed and hurt when things didn’t work out.   

He knew it wasn’t Aaron’s fault – not really. He hadn’t even told Aaron about his plans, thinking that a surprise would be…what? Nice? _Romantic_? God no, that wasn’t why he’d gone to all that effort and kept it a secret. Was it? Robert angrily shook his head and stomped into his living room. Maybe the whole evening wasn’t ruined. Aaron would turn up eventually and even though they’d missed out on the food, they could still watch a movie or even just head straight to bed. That was what they were good at after all. He slumped down onto the sofa and turned the television on. He’d wait up for Aaron and then drag him off to bed so the other man could make it up to him. That would be good enough. That would make up for his other plans not working out. Wouldn’t it?

***

Robert awoke to the feeling of his back twinging in protest. He squinted and then rubbed at his eyes, looking at the television that was still flickering away quietly, the BBC news channel on the screen. Everything was exactly as he’d left it when he’d sat down on the sofa. And there was no sign of Aaron. Robert looked at the screen again and his heart sank. 1:14am the little clock in the corner of the screen showed. He grabbed his phone from the arm of the sofa and lit up the screen. Nothing. Not a text or a call, just nothing. Aaron hadn’t even bothered to text and say where he was or what he was doing.

Robert pushed himself up from the sofa and turned the television off. He wandered back through to the kitchen, switching off the lights as he went. For a moment, he paused in the doorway. He glanced at his phone but no matter how much he willed it, there was no communication from Aaron.

Maybe if he went to bed and drifted off to sleep, Aaron would come and let himself in and wake him up again. He thought about it for a moment, almost allowing himself to smile at the prospect, but then he frowned and shook his head angrily. What sort of sad, desperate loser was he? Waiting for Aaron to come over and give him some attention when he’d finally got bored with his mates. No chance, that wasn’t how things worked between them. That wasn’t how Robert worked. He stomped to the front door of his flat, grabbed the chain and sulkily slammed it into the bolt on the door frame. Even if Aaron decided to grace him with his presence, he wasn’t getting in now and that was exactly what Robert wanted. Right?  He huffed out a frustrated sigh and headed to his bedroom. As he crawled into his bed and pulled the covers up over his shoulders, he wondered why everything felt so heavy and why he felt quite so hurt.

***

The following evening, Robert was busy. He’d been busy all day. So busy, in fact, that he hadn’t had any time to even acknowledge the messages from Aaron on his phone.

He knew he was acting like a brat. He knew he was being dramatic. He knew this wasn’t how he was supposed to feel about his ‘friend’. But he couldn’t help it. He was upset and angry and confused about what had happened and how he felt about it all. He kept telling himself he needed to get a grip. But he was kind of enjoying making Aaron work hard for his attention.

He was sitting at his little dining table with his laptop in front of him when he heard the door of the flat open. He actually tensed a little but then forced his face to relax.

Aaron wandered into the kitchen and Robert glanced up at him quickly before focusing back on his screen. “Alright?” he said simply. He watched Aaron hover about near the sink from the corner of his eye, feigning indifference to his presence.

“Yeah, are you?” Aaron asked. Robert could hear the tone of confusion and was it concern in Aaron’s voice? _Good,_ he thought petulantly.  

Robert looked up at him questioningly, keeping his face blank apart from his raised eyebrows trying to look as innocent as he could manage despite knowing that he’d purposefully made Aaron wonder what was going on.

“Just…well, I text you earlier…a few times actually, and you didn’t get back to me. I thought something was wrong.”

Robert’s heart did a funny little jump at the words. Aaron obviously did care; he _was_ affected by Robert not being in touch with him. But he wasn’t quite ready to let him off the hook just yet.

“I’ve been busy,” he stated simply and turned his focus back to his laptop.  

“Too busy to check your phone?” Aaron asked. There was definitely a tone of irritation creeping into his voice and Robert wasn’t prepared to become the ‘bad guy’ in this discussion.

“About as busy as you last night, I suppose,” Robert muttered, still facing the screen in front of him.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Aaron snapped. “We got caught up on a call-out so we were later going to the pub than we’d planned. I told you we were going after shift. You know what the lads are like; one pint turned into four and then it was really late. I don’t get what the problem is. It’s not like I promised I’d be coming over or anything.”

Robert did look at him as he finished speaking. “You could have called, or at least text, to let me know you weren’t coming, that’s all.”

“It was late when we left the pub. I didn’t want to disturb you,” Aaron said simply. He still looked annoyed that Robert had challenged him about his whereabouts. “And I didn’t realise that I had to give you regular updates about what I was doing or where I was.”

Robert scowled at him. He didn’t like that fact that Aaron was turning this back on him, like he was the one who had done something wrong. “D’you know what? You’re right,” He replied sarcastically. “It’s not common courtesy to let someone know if you’ll be popping over. Or even that you’re knackered and just going to head home. I shouldn’t have expected that from you. I shouldn’t have expected that you’d just drop me a quick text to say you’re okay. But it would have been nice and then I wouldn’t have gone to the effort…” He suddenly stopped talking, afraid that he’d said too much, revealed too much about how hurt he felt. This wasn’t what they did. He pushed himself up from his seat and walked over to the kettle to make a cup of tea. He needed to stop this conversation now.

“Gone to the effort of what?” Aaron asked from behind him.

Robert’s shoulders tensed. “Nothing,” he said quietly.

He felt Aaron step up behind him and then his hands on his waist as he turned him round to face him. Aaron’s face had softened from the obvious frustration that had been there before and Robert couldn’t look him in the eye. This was too much. He might as well have had hearts in his eyes and he was terrified of Aaron seeing them. He needed to get a grip.

“Do you want a brew?” he asked, desperate to change the subject. He slipped out of Aaron’s grip and went to the cupboard to grab two mugs, knowing that Aaron rarely turned down a cup of tea.

“Rob…” Aaron said from behind him.

He brushed past Aaron again as he placed the mugs down on the counter. Drawing in a breath and plastering a smile on his face, he turned to face him again. “Look, I’ve had a long day, a long couple of days actually, so I was just sulking,” he forced out with a shake of his head and a little chuckle. It was a crappy lie but the best he could come up with. Hopefully, it’d be enough to cover his behaviour and throw Aaron off from whatever he’d been thinking was going on. “You can’t leave a bloke hanging around waiting to get his end away and not expect him to be grumpy,” he added with a carefree shrug.

Aaron’s eyebrows rose but a smile appeared on his face. He stepped into Robert’s space and patted him on the cheek as he spoke. “Aw, you’re all grumpy because you didn’t get a shag,” he cooed at Robert. It seemed like the lie had worked – Aaron had seemingly immediately forgotten Robert’s odd behaviour. He reached his hands behind Robert and squeezed his arse, before pressing forwards and kissing him. “Would you like me to make it up to you?” he murmured against Robert’s lips when he drew away.

Strangely enough, Robert almost wanted to say ‘no’. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to have sex with Aaron – he couldn’t get enough of the other man. But he was quickly realising that the problem was that maybe the shagging just wasn’t _enough_. Half of him wanted to sit Aaron down and have _that_ conversation with him, but the fear of what that might mean and what he risked in raising the issue was too much. It was easier to just take what he could get for now and, besides, he really did want to shag Aaron. So everything was fine – if he kept telling himself that, eventually it would be.  

He put on his best faux ‘I’m not impressed’ face and blinked at Aaron slowly. “You’ve got some serious work to do, Dingle.”

“I’m always up for a challenge,” Aaron told him with a wink.

Robert couldn’t help but huff out a laugh at Aaron’s ridiculous cheekiness. He pretended to be reluctant as Aaron pushed him towards his bedroom, but who was he kidding, really?     

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm snarfettelove on tumblr.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you as always to all of you lovely people for your amazingly kind feedback - I'm honestly not worthy.
> 
> I'm back at work now so unfortunately updates may have to slow down a little, but I'll try my best to keep writing as fast as I can so I don't keep you waiting too long. This is the longest chapter so far and there are more feelings ahead! I hope you enjoy.

Aaron’s shift hadn’t started too badly really, but that had changed. A few hours before he was due to go home, a call had come in about a house fire. The sound of the alarm blaring through the fire station still sent a thrill through Aaron every time it rang out causing him and his watch mates to jump up and run for the engine. 

They’d responded and headed out to the call as normal. When they’d first arrived, it had looked like so many other house fires they’d attended. Flames licking at the walls, bursting out of smashed windows; people standing around outside in shock, staring back at their home in horror. The fire crew had jumped into action, their watch manager immediately assessing the situation and barking out orders for each member of the watch.

Two members of the crew had been sent to round up the residents of the neighbouring houses and get them outside. The row of houses was terraced and fires could easily spread. There had been no answer from the house next door and some of the people already milling about on the street had said that the woman who lived there would be out at work at that time of the day. Aaron had wondered whether that was a blessing or not when they realised that the fire had indeed spread through the roof space from the first house into the one adjoining it. He wasn’t sure which would be worse – standing helplessly watching your home be destroyed by the flames, or returning to find it smouldering without having a clue what had gone on.

Aaron had been pulling on his breathing apparatus in preparation to enter the still burning house and relieve the first team that had gone in when he’d heard a shout from the crowd of people standing in the street. Looking up in the direction that the man was pointing in, he’d seen that the owner of the neighbouring house was actually at home after all. She had been banging on her bedroom window, eyes wide, screaming for help between coughing and trying to cover her mouth. The smoke behind her in the room was obvious.

Aaron and several members of the crew had rushed to the house, breaking the door down only to be met by a ferocious fire burning on the stairs. They’d battled against it and managed to make it up to the woman’s bedroom, bursting through the door to find the room full of thick, black smoke. Unable to see anything through the smoke in the room, Aaron had felt about in the dark until his hand had brushed against something soft and he’d found the woman collapsed in front of the window. Even in the darkness of the room, she didn’t look good; there weren’t any signs of movement, but maybe it wasn’t too late. Aaron had lifted her and got her out as quickly as possible, rushing her straight to the paramedics who had been waiting outside.

She hadn’t survived. Smoke inhalation had killed her before the crew had managed to get to her.

Aaron had stared at her for a long time. He’d been able to hear the crying from the woman’s neighbours, his crew still rushing about finally getting the fire under control and extinguishing it, his boss’ orders, and the sound of more sirens as the police arrived and the fire investigation team pulled up. They’d want to interview him about what had happened. That was procedure when they’d had a fatality whilst on a job. He’d stared at the woman until the paramedics covered her up with a white sheet and then turned back to his boss. There was always plenty to be done even after the fire had been tackled.

***

Aaron wasn’t really sure how he’d ended up outside Robert’s door, or how long he’d been standing there. Usually when he’d had a shift like the one he’d just had, he’d head straight home and throw back enough beers to send himself into a deep, hopefully dreamless, sleep. Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn’t. But tonight, he’d left the fire station and felt like he needed to be with someone – not just someone, _Robert_. He’d just driven on autopilot and found himself standing staring at Robert’s front door. He had a key but for some reason he hadn’t made any attempt to use it. He didn’t even know how long he’d been there.

His phone suddenly bursting into life in his pocket shook him awake from his trance and he fished it out to see Robert’s name on the screen. Before he had time to answer the call, the door to Robert’s flat was yanked open and Robert was standing there looking at him bemusedly with his phone still to his ear.

Robert lowered the phone and ended the call, a confused smile on his face. “What ya doing?” he asked brightly.

“I was just…” Aaron trailed off. He felt so out of it, he couldn’t even string a sentence together. It was stupid really. It wasn’t like he’d never lost anyone on a call-out before. That was part of their job – they had to accept that sometimes they couldn’t save everyone despite their best efforts. But that just didn’t seem good enough when he pictured that poor woman’s terrified face.

Robert reached out to him, sliding his hand around the back of his head and stroking the side of his face gently with his thumb. “Are you alright, Aaron?” he asked softly.

Aaron looked up at him and felt like he could cry. He needed this; he needed Robert. This is why he’d come here. “I…it was a bad shift,” he managed to say.

A gentle, understanding smile pulled at Robert’s lips. “Come in,” he said quietly, letting Aaron pass him as he shut the front door.

Aaron toed off his shoes and wandered into the kitchen. He felt exhausted, like he could sleep for a week. But he was glad he was on shift again tomorrow. He would have hated it if he knew he had the next four days to kick around at home overthinking about what had happened.

Robert came up behind him and wrapped his arms around him. He nuzzled his face into the hair behind Aaron’s ear and Aaron felt himself melting a little at the sensation. It wasn’t even a sexual thing; he just wanted the comfort. He leant back against Robert, his head tipping back, and closed his eyes. 

“Why don’t you go and get into bed?” Robert murmured against his ear.

It sounded like a wonderful idea, but he still felt the need to protest for some reason. “It’s early,” he replied.

“Who cares?” Robert asked quietly. He turned Aaron around in his arms and kissed his forehead. “Go on,” he said. “I’ll be through in a few minutes.”

For once, Aaron did as he was told. He wandered into Robert’s bedroom, stripping off his clothes and dropping them on the floor as he went. He knew it drove Robert crazy when he left his stuff all over the place, but he really couldn’t be bothered to worry about it. He climbed into bed in just his boxers and pulled the duvet up over himself.

As he lay there, he knew he’d have to sort his head out when Robert came to join him. He probably wasn’t in the right frame of mind for a shag but that’s what they did, didn’t they? Wasn’t that why he’d come over here? Because he needed comfort? And surely the best way for him to get that was letting Robert take his mind off everything that had happened on his shift. Robert wouldn’t want him pouring his heart out and crying about how life was unfair. That certainly wasn’t what they did, so he’d have to toughen up and get over it.

Aaron could actually feel his eyelids growing heavier by the time Robert came into the room, but he forced himself to wake up a bit again. Robert placed two mugs on his bedside cabinet before stripping down to his underwear and climbing into bed beside Aaron. He sat propped up against the headboard and smiled down at Aaron softly.

“I made you a brew,” he said quietly.

Aaron pushed himself into a sitting position, leaning back against the pillows, and gratefully accepted the mug that Robert held out to him. “Cheers,” he said before he blew across the surface of his tea. It was far too hot to drink yet so he just stared down at the drink for a few moments.

“D’you want to talk about it?” Robert asked eventually. “I mean, about what happened today. You don’t have to if you don’t want to.” He actually sounded a little nervous and Aaron thought it was incredibly endearing really.

Aaron leaned back to place his mug on top of the bedside cabinet and then moved himself further down the bed a little. Robert somehow seemed to understand what he was doing and also shuffled down so his head was against his pillows. Shuffling closer to Robert once he was settled, Aaron laid his head on Robert’s chest and immediately relaxed as Robert wrapped his arm around his back.

“We got called out to a house fire,” he began, finding it easier to talk laid down like this. “The family were all out and safe, we cleared the other houses in case it spread, all routine stuff. But there was a woman…” He stumbled over his words a little before carrying on. “She was next door and we didn’t know. She was trapped and by the time I got to her…it was too late.”

Robert’s arm had tightened around Aaron as he spoke. “I’m sorry,” he said softly. His voice sounded a little wobbly and Aaron was about to look up at his face, when Robert pressed a kiss against the top of his head and stilled his movement. “I’m sure you did everything you could.”

Aaron sighed heavily. “I just wish it was enough.”

“I know it’s easy for me to say, but think about all of the people you _have_ saved and all of the people you’ll keep saving.” Robert was quiet for a while, then he added, “I know it must be really hard for you, but I’m glad you told me.”

“Me too,” Aaron agreed before he yawned.

Robert looked down at him as Aaron glanced up looking a little sheepish. “You should get some sleep. You’ve had a shitty day and you look ready to drop.”

Aaron looked at him in surprise. “Don’t you want…you know. I thought you’d want a shag or something.” He could feel the heat in his cheeks and wondered after everything they’d done together, and done to one another, why he felt embarrassed saying it.

He was even more surprised by the little frown on Robert’s face. He’d expected Robert to either take him up on the offer or laugh at him, not look the way he did at Aaron’s words.

Shifting a little so Aaron was lying back against the pillow and Robert could lean over him, Robert spoke quietly. “It’s not that I don’t want to. You’re in my bed, of course I want you; I always want you. But after the day you’ve had and the way you look right now, I think sleep is all you need.”

It must have been the emotions of the day finally getting to him because Aaron could actually feel the sting of tears burning at his eyes as he listened to Robert’s caring words and he quickly closed his eyes to avoid Robert seeing.

“Get some sleep,” Robert said as he pressed a kiss to Aaron’s temple. He slid down the bed a little and draped his arm across Aaron’s chest, pulling him close as Aaron rolled onto his side so Robert could spoon up behind him.

Something felt like it wanted to burst out of Aaron’s chest as he lay wrapped in Robert’s arms. It was like the warmth of Robert’s body pressed up against him had filled him up with something else that he couldn’t touch but he knew it was there. Putting a name to the feeling was far too scary for right now. He just wanted to lie there with Robert and sleep. “Thank you,” he whispered, not even sure if Robert would hear him. When he felt Robert’s arm pull him a little closer still, he knew he had. 

***

Aaron jolted awake. Robert had kicked him in the shin again. On some nights, he’d noticed that Robert twitched and kicked a lot and on others he slept like the dead, hardly moving. He wondered if Robert was dreaming when he got particularly restless, but he’d never raised the issue.

It appeared that Robert had kicked him once and then fallen still, his breathing deep and even, his face relaxed. It was still early: the sun was just beginning to rise, pale early morning light through the curtains.

Aaron took the opportunity to just look at Robert. It was rare for him to be awake first; it had happened a few times before but Robert had always stirred not long after Aaron. Now it seemed that Robert was still deeply asleep, with no signs of him waking up any time soon. So Aaron just looked at him. Maybe it was a bit weird. He knew that Robert would make fun of him if he knew he’d done it, but he didn’t want to waste the opportunity.

His eyes roamed across Robert’s face. His soft pink lips were slightly parted as he breathed deeply. The dim sunlight was already highlighting the strands of different shades of blond in his hair. _Like gold_ , Aaron thought to himself. He propped himself up on his elbow to look down at Robert. The faint freckles across Robert’s cheeks and nose seemed more obvious somehow. Maybe because, for once, Robert was completely still and Aaron could actually just look at them. And now he was looking, he realised how _beautiful_ Robert was. Of course he’d always thought Robert was fit. That was obvious. But it suddenly dawned on him that Robert was so much more than that and he was sure that he’d never meet anyone who took his breath away like Robert did.

The urge to do something suddenly became too much. He couldn’t resist the temptation to touch anymore so he leant down and pressed a soft kiss to Robert’s cheek. He stroked his thumb across Robert’s eyebrow and then gently traced the pattern of his freckles across his cheek with the tip of his finger.

Blinking sleepily, Robert’s eyelids fluttered open at his ministrations, and then he smiled warmly at Aaron.

“G’morning,” Robert murmured, his voice hardly above a whisper. He was all sleep soft and lovely, and Aaron almost wanted to burst with how much he was feeling as he watched him waking up gradually.

“Morning,” he whispered against Robert’s cheek, before reaching up and pressing a kiss to his lips.

Robert hummed in contentment. “This is a nice way to wake up,” he said quietly as Aaron pulled away slightly and hovered over him.

Their eyes locked and Aaron smiled at him. “I wanted to say thank you for last night.”

“You don’t need to thank me,” Robert replied, his expression soft as he looked up at Aaron. He reached up a hand to stroke it through Aaron’s hair. “I’m glad you came here when you needed me.”

And that was it, wasn’t it? Aaron needed Robert. Not so long ago, the realisation might have sent him into a panic, but he’d been wondering how he could put a name to his feelings about Robert for a while now. He knew that they were way beyond friends with benefits – well, he knew he was anyway. He wondered whether Robert had fallen as far as he had without even realising it.

“Rob…” he started but was cut off by the shrill ringing of Robert’s phone alarm. The sound cut straight through the peace of the moment as they’d been lying there looking at one another.

“Fuck it all,” Robert grumbled as he reached over and grabbed his phone, silencing the alarm. He flopped back against his pillow with a frown on his face. “Sorry. I’ve got that stupid meeting in Manchester today so I need to get up and hit the road.” 

“I’d forgotten you’d got an early start,” Aaron said apologetically as he rolled back to his own side of the bed. “I shouldn’t have come over last night and disturbed you.”

Robert immediately reached out and grabbed his arm, a serious look on his face. “Don’t be daft,” he said. “I’m glad you came. You can always come here, you know that. I like having you here.”

Aaron smiled at him before he surged up and pressed a kiss against his lips. “Time for a shower?” he asked with a cheeky grin.

Laughing and rolling his eyes, Robert grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the bed and towards his bathroom.

***

Thankfully, Aaron’s next few shifts had gone smoothly, with no tragedies or loss of life. His watch mates had all been morose about what had happened at the house fire and in some ways that helped Aaron to feel better. He knew that his reaction was a completely normal human way to react to the events. They’d all talked about what had happened and by the end of the next shift they’d been feeling more like their usual selves. The banter between them all had started to flow again and the call outs they’d attended had been successful leaving them feeling more confident once again.

Aaron had finished up the second of his night shifts from that week and decided to head over to Robert’s. He’d told him that he probably would and then text him as he left the fire station, even though Robert would be fast asleep, just to let him know he’d be coming over. After their little row (could it even be called that?) the day after his birthday, Aaron had decided it was only fair to let Robert know if he was coming over or not.

Aaron still hadn’t got his head around what had actually happened that day. He didn’t understand where Robert’s sulky attitude and the silent treatment he’d received all day had come from. Robert had brushed it off that he was just tired and needed to release some pressure with a good fuck, but Aaron couldn’t help but think there was more to it. He’d started to wonder if Robert had known it was his birthday and was pissed off that he hadn’t been invited to the pub with his mates, but he hadn’t even mentioned his birthday to Robert (he didn’t want any fuss) so that couldn’t have been it. It had been so late by the time he’d left the pub that night and knowing that Robert had work the next day, he’d genuinely not wanted to disturb him so he’d gone back his own flat despite the fact that he’d have really enjoyed a shag on his birthday. He’d resigned himself to never really understanding, and Robert had seemed to be completely back to normal as soon as Aaron had stripped him of his clothes that night, so he supposed it was better to just let it go. He certainly wasn’t going to be bringing it up again and sparking another argument. 

It was still early, but the city centre traffic was already picking up so Aaron was pleased when he finally made it to Robert’s apartment and let himself in. He kicked off his boots in the hallway as usual and was about to head straight to Robert’s bedroom when a sound from the kitchen stopped him. He wandered the other way and peered in to see Robert standing by the little dining table smiling a little dopily at him. He stepped into the room and realised that the table was covered in all sorts of breakfast food.

“What’ya doing?” was all he could manage to say.

Robert’s grin widened. “Well, you said you’d be coming over after your shift, and you’ve had a tough week, and I know that you’re off now for four days, so I thought it’d be nice for us to have some breakfast together, well tea for you, I suppose, before we head to bed.”

Aaron couldn’t help but think that Robert sounded a little nervous as he spoke quickly. “Before ‘we’ head to bed? Haven’t you just got up?” he asked in confusion.

“Well, I, um, I stayed up all night so we could do this and then spend the day in bed together,” he announced. And as Aaron looked at him he realised that Robert did look truly knackered like he’d been up all night.

Aaron stepped up to him and kissed him. “You really didn’t need to do all this, you know. And you must be shattered if you’ve been up all night.”

“I know. But it’s Saturday today so no work for me and I thought it’d be nice to spend some time together otherwise you’d just be asleep while I was bored on my own. And I wanted to anyway – I thought I’d do something nice for you.”

Aaron looked at him and shook his head slightly at how soft Robert could be at times. “It’s a lovely idea,” he told him. “Thank you.”

Robert’s slightly manic grin widened and Aaron knew that they wouldn’t have long before Robert was practically falling asleep in his croissant as he just wasn’t used to staying up all night, but the gesture was incredibly sweet and he planned to properly thank Robert later when they’d both caught up on some sleep. 

***

“I can’t believe you brought me here under false pretences,” Robert declared loudly.

The pub was particularly noisy seeing as it was quiz night and it was packed. Most of the teams were made up of members of various emergency services. They all seemed to converge on the pub that Aaron had first invited Robert to and it created a rather competitive atmosphere between each team for quiz night.

“Aaron said you knew loads of movie trivia, especially about comic book stuff, so we told him he had to bring you,” Adam told him as he clapped him firmly on the back. “And no pressure, but those dickheads from Leeds General have wiped the floor with us for the last few weeks so we need your input.”

“I’m not even a fireman!” Robert declared.

“Doesn’t say anywhere in the rules that the team has to be made up of members of the emergency services. Come on, man – you can’t back out on us.”

Robert sighed and rolled his eyes as he looked back at Aaron. Aaron tried to hold back his smile at Robert’s pretend sulking. He knew that secretly Robert was relishing the chance to take part in the quiz and his inner geek was dying to let loose with some seriously weird general knowledge.

The quiz got going and Robert fitted into the team well. He’d managed to give them a couple of answers that had left the rest of them completely blank and earned himself a few celebratory slaps on the back from various members of Aaron’s watch.

At the halfway point in the quiz, Aaron had gone up to the bar to get a round in. A firm body had squeezed in at the crowded bar right behind him and he’d turned round, half-expecting Robert to be standing there smirking at him, but was instead met with the brightly smiling face of his ex-boyfriend.

He hadn’t see Jackson in a social setting for quite a while. Their paths crossed because of work, what with Aaron attending incidents with the fire brigade and Jackson working as a paramedic. That was how they’d met, so it was no surprise that they’d continue to bump into one another. They just hadn’t been out in the same places for some time. Their relationship hadn’t ended badly – it was all very civilised as they’d agreed that they wanted different things, but it was still a little awkward to be pressed together at the bar like they were.

Jackson immediately struck up a conversation and Aaron couldn’t help but chat away with him. Jackson had always been so friendly and approachable. He’d helped Aaron a lot with coming to terms with who he was and his sexuality and there would always be a place for him in Aaron’s heart.

As they laughed and joked, Aaron’s eyes flicked over to his table to see Robert staring back at him with his jaw clenched. The spark of giddiness about the quiz had disappeared, replaced with something that Aaron had never seen on his face before. When he realised that Aaron had caught him staring, Robert tore his gaze away and focused on draining his pint, laughing half-heartedly at something that Adam said.  

Eventually, Aaron wrapped up his conversation with Jackson and headed back to the table with the drinks. He slipped back into his seat next to Robert and nudged him as he passed him his pint.

“Alright?” he asked when Robert refused to meet his eyes.

“Fine,” Robert replied bluntly.

Aaron was about to challenge him on it, but Robert pushed himself up from his seat abruptly, muttering something about the loo. It took all of five seconds for Aaron to stand up and follow him, ignoring the whistles from his mates.

Robert was standing washing his hands, trying to make himself look busy, when Aaron walked in.

“What’s up?” he asked immediately.

Robert just looked at him and shrugged slightly. “Nothing,” he replied with a little shake of his head.

“Bullshit,” Aaron declared. “You were fine one minute and then as soon as you saw me talking to Jackson you got a face like thunder.”

“Jackson,” Robert said the name to himself. “Do you know him then?”

Aaron sighed. He wasn’t going to lie; he had nothing to hide. “Yeah, he’s my ex. He’s a paramedic.”

Robert’s jaw clenched as he nodded. “So you see him around a lot then?” he asked.

“Every once and a while if we’re attending the same scene.” Aaron wondered how Robert would react to him calling him out on his jealousy because it was blatantly obvious that that’s what it was. He decided it might be better to just reassure Robert instead. “I’ve not seen him outside of work for a long time so we were just catching up. He’s got a boyfriend – he’s here with him tonight actually. I can introduce you to them if you like.”

“God no!” Robert exclaimed, his face flushing a little.

Robert seemed to relax a little after that, his shoulders losing some of their tension at Aaron’s reassurance. It was quite amusing for Aaron to watch but he thought it best not mention.   

“Come on, grumpy,” he said as he grabbed Robert’s hand, laughing at the look on his face. “As much as I love hanging around in pub toilets, we’ve got a quiz to win.”

***

When they got back to Aaron’s flat, Robert pounced on him immediately, pressing him up against the wall of his hallway as soon as they’d kicked their shoes off. He pushed his body against Aaron’s, grabbing his wrists and pinning them to the wall as he kissed him deeply. His tongue licked into Aaron’s mouth as he slotted his thigh between Aaron’s legs and rolled his hips causing Aaron to moan at the friction.

It had been written all over Robert’s face and obvious in his body language at the pub after Aaron’s chat with Jackson that Robert was going to need to relieve some of the stress his ‘not-jealousy’ had caused and Aaron had been looking forward to it immensely. He was quite happy to go along with whatever Robert had in mind in his attempt to remind Aaron that he didn’t need to be looking anywhere else for sex.

He thrust his hips forward to meet Robert’s movement, groaning low in his throat again.

“God, you drive me crazy,” Robert all but growled against his ear. He kissed his way to Aaron’s neck and sucked on the skin there, knowing the effect it would have on him. Aaron turned his head, stretching his neck and leaving more skin for Robert to attack, shivers running through his body at the feeling of Robert’s tongue and teeth on his sensitive flesh.

It didn’t take long for Robert to manoeuvre them into the bedroom. Sometimes Aaron wondered how he was so good at multi-tasking, but he’d managed to walk them to the bedroom and strip them of most of their clothes by the time they got there, all while kissing Aaron as they moved. He pressed Aaron down against the bed and continued kissing him as he ran his hand down his chest to his crotch and palmed at his erection through his boxers. Aaron gasped, pulling his lips away from Robert’s and arching his hips towards his touch.

“Are you gonna fuck me?” Aaron panted as Robert slipped his hand inside his underwear. God, he really wanted Robert to fuck him tonight.

“You want me to?” Robert asked, but it was a pointless question because they both knew the answer.

Pulling Robert closer with a hand behind his head, Aaron whispered against his lips, “God, yes.”

Robert thrust his tongue into his mouth for another searing kiss before he sat back on his ankles. He hooked his fingers into the waistband of Aaron’s boxers and pulled them down with a little wriggling from Aaron. Then his eyes traced the length of Aaron’s body slowly. “On your knees,” he decided and Aaron immediately obliged, moving onto all fours and arching his back.

“Bloody hell, Aaron.” He heard Robert’s exclamation and smirked to himself. God, he loved this. He heard Robert opening the bedside drawer and then the click of a lid. Robert stroked a hand over his arse cheek reverently before making Aaron jump by leaning down and nipping at the soft flesh that he’d just been stroking. Then Robert slowly pushed a finger into him and Aaron arched into the touch. He rocked back against it and Robert added a second and a third finger as Aaron moaned and pleaded for more.

Aaron was already sweating from the sensation of rocking backwards and forwards, the warmth of Robert’s body pressing against him, and the brush of Robert’s fingers against his prostate. “Rob, I’m ready, _please_ ,” he panted. He didn’t even care if he sounded desperate; he was. He wanted Robert inside him and he wasn’t ashamed to beg.

Robert pulled his fingers away and Aaron could hear him ripping open a condom and a low groan as he rolled it on. Then one of Robert’s large hands settled on his hip as he pressed his cock against Aaron’s hole. He pushed forward and Aaron gasped a tiny breath. It didn’t matter how many times they did this, the feeling of being so completely filled still stole his breath away. Robert eased inside, as aware as ever of not rushing things. When he’d bottomed out, he stilled and allowed Aaron chance to adjust to the feeling. He stroked his hands across Aaron’s back, across his hips and then settled his hands there. Aaron rocked back against him and that was all the signal that Robert needed.

Robert clearly wasn’t in the mood for slow as he set a fast pace, pulling out of Aaron nearly completely before slamming back into him over and over. Aaron had one hand gripping the headboard and the other twisted in his duvet as Robert drove into him. They were both moaning and swearing as Robert moved inside him.

Then he suddenly slowed. Aaron was about to ask him what he was playing at when Robert’s arms slipped around his chest and he started pulling him upright. “Up,” he commanded. “Come on.”

Aaron allowed himself to be pulled up to his knees, his back pressed against Robert’s chest, feeling Robert’s cock shifting inside him as he moved. The change in angle made him feel like Robert was somehow, impossibly deeper inside him. “Oh, _fuck_ ,” he moaned out as Robert started to thrust into him in their new position. Robert reached around and wrapped his hand around Aaron’s dick, stroking it firmly as he thrust his hips quickly, his other arm wrapped around Aaron’s chest, his fingertips teasing across his nipple. Aaron reached up behind him and threaded the fingers of one hand into the hair at the base of Robert’s skull, dragging him closer as he writhed in pleasure.  

“You have no idea what you do to me,” Robert whispered against his ear. Aaron thought he had a pretty good idea seeing as Robert had the same effect on him. He could feel himself chasing his orgasm. He wanted the release, to feel that pleasure, but he didn’t want this to end.

Robert moved his arm across his chest, his fingers reaching up to stroke at Aaron’s neck, pushing his head back and to the side slightly and then he clamped his lips onto the skin where Aaron’s neck met his shoulder and sucked.

The combination of sensations was too much. Aaron’s orgasm ripped through him, his come spraying up his own chest and onto the sheets as he yelled out Robert’s name.

Robert tore his lips away from his neck and Aaron could hear him and feel him panting against the damp skin he’d left behind. He continued to pound into Aaron, still holding him upright with his strong arms, until his own climax hit and he shuddered through it as he filled the condom, thrusting weakly into Aaron a few more times.

Aaron collapsed against his bed in a sweaty heap, half-expecting Robert to land on top of him at any moment, but as he turned his head to the side he saw Robert disappearing into the bathroom to dispose of the condom. Within moments he was back at the bed, climbing in beside Aaron and flopping back against the pillows, handing him a flannel to clean himself up a bit.

“You should come to quiz night more often if that’s how you react to winning stuff,” Aaron remarked as he turned his head to look at Robert’s sweaty face. He had a feeling that the real reason for Robert being so worked up was actually his encounter with Jackson, but he wasn’t planning on bringing that up and ruining the blissed out mood.

Robert hummed in agreement before he rolled sideways to be closer to Aaron. “I might just do that,” he said, as he draped his arm across Aaron’s chest.

Robert’s eyes started to grow heavy as he settled against the pillow and Aaron couldn’t stop looking at him as he started to drift off. He wanted to count the freckles scattered across Robert’s face and memorise the patterns they made. Despite his best efforts, he couldn’t fight off his own weariness for long and he too slipped into sleep, feeling more content than he could ever remember being before.     


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think there's probably going to be two more chapters after this one. Brace yourselves for the dreaded feelings!

Aaron was a bloody nuisance. That’s what Robert kept muttering to himself as he parked his car along the street from the fire station. If he wasn’t so happy to just throw his stuff all over the damn flat, he wouldn’t forget stuff like his phone.

It was all rather domestic but Robert liked his place tidy, and Aaron seemed to have no such concerns as whenever he came over he always ended up chucking his belongings all over the place. And now, because he was such an untidy, disorganised scruff, he’d gone and left his phone on the floor in Robert’s bedroom and Robert had had to deliver it to the station on his lunch break in case Aaron needed it.

He felt like telling Aaron that he wasn’t his personal maid, tidying up after him, but then he knew he’d probably just get some cheeky comment about dressing up as one as part of some kinky game and it really wasn’t worth giving Aaron any ideas.

As he wandered up to the fire station, he could see that the large shutter doors were rolled up and the two fire engines were both absent. Typical he’d come all this way to find Aaron wasn’t even here and he’d have to leave the phone with their admin officer without even getting chance to see Aaron in his uniform. Because despite trying to tell himself that Aaron was a pain who’d given him an extra job to squeeze into his already busy day, in reality Robert was never go to pass up the opportunity to come here and perv on Aaron at work. In fact, the phone had given him the perfect excuse to be here so Aaron’s untidiness had its benefits after all. Shame he wasn’t going to get chance to see him.

Feeling a little disheartened, he walked up the driveway towards the fire station and was about to pass through the doors when he heard the sound of a large diesel engine rumbling down the street and turned to see the two fire engines pulling onto the forecourt. His heart actually seemed to skip a beat at the sight and he tried hard not to let his smile grow too wide.

Within seconds of pulling up, the crew were piling out, laughing and joking and shoving each other around despite all looking sweaty and covered in dust. And then Aaron jumped down from the engine and Robert was pretty sure his mouth had dropped open like some cartoon character. Because Aaron looked like he was starring in the bloody _Diet Coke_ advert.

All coherent thoughts disappeared from Robert’s brain as he watched Aaron climb down the first step and then jump the rest of the way onto the concrete. His eyes trailed up Aaron’s body, taking in the fire kit he was wearing, from the sturdy boots, up the heavy trousers he had to wear to protect him from the flames, to the tight navy t-shirt he had tucked into his trousers. Fortunately, he’d removed the large, bulky overcoat he had to wear when he attended a fire but the thick, red braces he wore to hold up his trousers were still in place over his shoulders. His hair was curly, not a drop of gel in sight, and he was deliciously sweaty, with a smudge of ash across his cheek. If Robert didn’t know any better, he’d think Aaron had planned this moment down to the last detail, because Robert was staring at a real-life version of every fireman fantasy he’d ever entertained.

“Oi, oi!” A shout went up from the crew and Robert was startled from his daydreaming. “The quiz-master’s here!” Robert was thumped on the back several times by the enthusiastic members of Aaron’s watch as they passed him on the way to remove their gear. He’d become quite popular with Aaron’s friends after quiz night and they’d apparently all been insisting that he attended the quiz every week from now on.

He grinned at them as they greeted him and then turned his eyes back to Aaron. He watched as Adam whispered something in Aaron’s ear, something cheeky by the look on Aaron’s face, before he shoved his friend playfully away from him. Adam was laughing, that bright bubbly laugh that seemed to be his trademark, as he approached Robert. “Alright, mate,” he greeted Robert happily. “Nice to see you. Just popped over to say hi, have we? Don’t keep him too long – I can only keep the boss off his case for so long, you know.” He winked at Robert before sauntering off inside the building, whistling loudly as he went.

Aaron wandered over to him and rolled his eyes at Adam’s words. “Ignore him,” he chuckled. “Y’alright?”

Robert was still trying to get his brain working again after he was pretty sure it had short-circuited when Aaron first appeared from the fire engine. “Phone,” he blurted out.

“What?” Aaron asked him with a look of concern.

“Sorry.” Robert could feel himself flushing. Jesus, why was he so hot standing outside at this time of year? He actually pulled at the scarf around his neck in an attempt to loosen it a little. “You left your phone at mine this morning and I thought you might need it.” He pulled Aaron’s phone from his pocket and held it out to him.

Aaron reached out and their fingers brushed as he took the phone from Robert. Robert licked his lips.

“You haven’t got any gel in your hair,” he said and wondered why he’d felt the need to point it out. He’d seen Aaron’s hair in its natural curly state before seeing as he’d seem him post-shower often enough.

Aaron actually ran his fingers through his hair, looking a little bashful. “Yeah, it usually looks like this after we’ve been on a call-out. The heat from the fire melts it off. Don’t know why I bother putting any on really.”

Robert had to force himself not to tackle Aaron to the ground there and then. Instead, he grabbed Aaron’s wrist. “Can I have a word?” he said gruffly, before he dragged Aaron around the side of the fire station building.

When they got far enough down the side of the building so they were out of view of the street, Robert turned to Aaron and pushed him up against the wall.

“Rob…wha-.”

Aaron was cut off as Robert pressed their lips together desperately. When Robert pulled away, he immediately set about pulling Aaron’s braces down his arms and unfastening his trousers.

“What are you doing?” Aaron asked, a bit of panic and bewilderment mixed in with the fact that he clearly knew what was about to happen and was very pleased about it.

“You can’t just turn up looking all…like _that_ ,” Robert growled as he tore at the fastenings on Aaron’s trousers, “and expect me to just wait until you get off shift later.”

Aaron laughed at Robert’s words. “It’s not my fault. I didn’t even know you’d be here. Not that I’m complaining,” he chuckled. His laughter quickly faded as Robert shoved his trousers down his thighs, quickly followed by his boxers, before he wrapped a fist around Aaron’s cock and stroked up and down his hard length firmly. “Bloody hell, Rob,” he groaned as he watched Robert biting his lip as he looked down at Aaron’s dick as he slid his hand over it.

Robert pumped his hand up and down a few more times before his eyes locked with Aaron’s. He licked his lips again and smirked at the way Aaron’s eyes followed the movement of his tongue. Then he sunk down to his knees in front of Aaron. He didn’t tease Aaron; he didn’t have time or the inclination at that moment. Instead he wrapped his lips around the tip of Aaron’s dick and then swallowed him down.

“ _Jesus_ ,” Aaron breathed as he tipped his head back against the wall.

Robert bobbed his head up and down, swallowing as much of Aaron’s length as he could, his hand alternating between moving over the root of his dick and teasing at his balls. His other hand had managed to undo his own trousers without him having to look down and he was stroking his own almost painfully hard cock as he desperately chased his own pleasure.

Glancing up, he realised that Aaron was now watching him, his mouth open as he panted. His fingers smoothed across Robert’s cheek and then he slipped his hand behind Robert’s head, stroking through the hair at the back of Robert’s head. Robert hummed lowly and Aaron momentarily closed his eyes. His hips had started to buck slightly as Robert sucked at him and suddenly the fingers in Robert’s hair tightened.

“Rob, _Robert_ , I’m gonna come,” he warned.

Robert didn’t stop his movement. He wanted to taste everything Aaron was going to give him.

Aaron shuddered. He held his fist up against his mouth to muffle his groans as he came. And still Robert didn’t release him. He swallowed around Aaron’s cock as his come hit the back of his throat. Only when Aaron had collapsed back against the wall did Robert allow his cock to fall from between his lips.

Standing up, wincing slightly as his knees cracked, he pressed his lips against Aaron’s and licked into his mouth again. He wrapped his hand around his own cock again and pumped his hand quickly up and down. Pressed up against Aaron, he spilled all over his hand. He slumped against Aaron as he tried to catch his breath and slow his heart rate.

“That was definitely an improvement on my normal routine when we get back from a call-out,” Aaron laughed as he pressed a quick kiss to the side of Robert’s head. 

“Not exactly what I’d planned when I turned up, but definitely one of my better ideas,” Robert agreed as he stepped back to straighten his clothes and tuck himself away.

“Oh, what the _hell_?” Aaron exclaimed as he looked down. “You jizzed on my fucking trousers!”

Robert couldn’t help it; he burst out laughing at the scandalised look on Aaron’s face. “Sorry,” he tried to say through his laughing, but he guessed his apology didn’t seem all that genuine. “It’ll come off,” he added with another laugh.

“Oh, ha-fucking-ha,” Aaron scowled, but he couldn’t hide the amused look on his face. “I’ve gotta walk back in there with a fucking jizz stain on my trousers.”

Robert was still laughing. He just couldn’t seem to stop. “I don’t think any of them were unaware of what was going on, do you? It’s your own fault for looking like that.” Robert motioned up and down the length of Aaron’s body with his hand and smirked at him again.  

Aaron looked less than impressed, but he just shook his head and rolled his eyes.

“I’ll make it up to you later,” Robert said with a wink. “And now I really better get going before we both get sacked.” Robert pressed a quick kiss against his lips and walked back down the side of the building. He grinned over his shoulder at Aaron and offered him a wave before he headed back to his car, a spring in his step as he went.

***

“So, his ex-boyfriend just happened to be there?” Vic asked as they made their way into the lift in Robert’s apartment block.

“Apparently, he’s a paramedic, so he was there with his workmates doing the quiz. Oh, and his new boyfriend was there too. But that didn’t explain why he was cosying up with Aaron at the bar,” Robert said as the lift arrived and they stepped into it. They’d normally have walked the few floors up to Robert’s flat, but they were laden down with the shopping bags as Robert had promised to cook his sister tea for a change so the lift was the easier option.

Aaron wasn’t coming over that evening. He was having an X-box and pizza night at Adam’s after their shift and that left Robert with a free evening to spend with his little sister. He was actually looking forward to it. Of course, he’d have been happy to have Aaron coming over, but he hadn’t had much chance to see Vic lately and they needed a catch-up. Besides, he’d promised her a meal as a small thank you for letting him crash at her place while his flat was being repaired after the fire.

“And he just came up to Aaron out of the blue?” Vic asked, pulling a face in disbelief.

“Well, no…Aaron said they still bump into each other sometimes when they’re on the same jobs. So I guess they’ve chatted or whatever when they’ve seen each other,” Robert said.

He’d started telling her about the night of the quiz because he’d been driving himself a bit crazy wondering if he should be worried about Jackson’s appearance, and he really needed someone to talk to about it and share his concerns.

“Oh,” Vic said like what he’d told her made everything make sense. “So you really have nothing to worry about. They’re obviously just mates. If they see each other around all the time and then this Jackson bloke came over to him, with his new boyfriend sitting right there, I don’t think you’ve got anything to be jealous about.”

The lift pinged as they arrived at Robert’s floor, and the doors slid open.

“ _Jealous_?” he spluttered. “I’m not _jealous_!”

“Okay, Rob. Whatever you say.” Vic rolled her eyes as she spoke. “So when do I get to meet Aaron?”

Robert gave her a disbelieving look with a raised eyebrow. “Never,” he said simply. “And why do you want to meet him anyway?”

“Well, obviously I’d like to meet my brother’s boyfriend,” Vic told him as they made their way down the hallway to Robert’s flat.

“He’s not my boyfriend,” Robert replied. His sister’s assumptions and runaway ideas about what they were to one another, were making his heart jolt and something flutter in his stomach.

They stood outside Robert’s flat as he put his shopping bags down to root around in his pocket for his keys.

Vic blew out an unimpressed puff of air. “Pfft. That’s only because you won’t _say_ that’s what he is.”

“You know me, Vic,” Robert said as he unlocked the door. “I don’t do all that serious stuff with feelings and shit.”

“Even with Aaron?” she asked with a knowing smile on her face as she passed him and entered the flat as he held the door open for her.

“Especially with Aaron,” Robert replied as he followed her into the flat. “He’s just my mate,” he said as he pushed the door closed with his foot and made his way through to the kitchen, dropping the heavy bags onto the worktop.

Glancing to the side, he saw Victoria with a strange look on her face. She was staring at him intently, looking almost sad. “Robert…” she started softly, “what are you going on about?”

Robert turned away and tried to avoid eye contact as he set about unpacking the bags. His sister was getting too close to a truth that Robert wasn’t sure he was ready to admit to himself, let alone anyone else. He could feel Vic’s eyes on him as he plonked each item onto the counter, but he steadfastly refused to look up until he felt her hand gently rest on his arm, stilling his movements.

“Rob, I can tell there’s more to this than you’re letting on. I can see that you’re falling for him.”

Looking up at her sharply, he felt his eyes widen and he shook his head slightly, but it was a pointless denial. She could see right through him and it scared him. Because if _she_ could see the truth, maybe Aaron could too and maybe he was going to run a mile to get away from Robert and his ‘ _feelings’_.

“Do you realise how ironic it would be?” he said as he paced across the kitchen in agitation. “How stupid am I to want to be with Aaron after what happened to mum? I’m terrified of losing someone in a fire; I’ve never really got over what happened to mum and now I want to be with a _fireman_ of all people! It’s ridiculous. It’ll never work.”

“It’s been working so far though, hasn’t it?” Vic asked as she approached him. She guided him to one of the chairs at his little dining table and forced him to sit down.

Sighing deeply, he ran a hand over his face.

“Does he know about what happened to mum?” Vic asked him gently.

Robert shook his head. “No. I’ve never told him about it. I didn’t want to freak him out, or make him think I was oversharing and taking things too seriously.”

“You’re an idiot, you know that, right?” Vic told him. “You should talk to him. You need to tell him about mum. He’d understand. From what you’ve told me, he sounds like a really good bloke and he deserves to know the truth. It might even help you to talk about it with him.”

Robert was quiet for a long time as he thought over what his sister had said. Maybe she was right. There was nothing that had ever made Robert think that Aaron would react badly to finding out about his mum. If anything, he knew that Aaron would be understanding and sympathetic and try his best to make him feel better somehow. That wasn’t the issue.

But he was terrified of sharing that most painful of things with him, pouring his heart out to Aaron, telling him that that was why he was keeping him at arm’s length to avoid getting hurt again, only for Aaron to look at him in surprise and ask him why he was even worried about it when that wasn’t what they were about anyway. What if Aaron didn’t see Robert as anything more than a mate that he slept with? And then Robert would end up getting hurt anyway because he had to start admitting to himself that he wanted more from Aaron than just friends with benefits. He wanted more. He wanted _everything_. But he was so scared.

“If I tell him about mum…and I tell him that I want to work through that and get past it and make our relationship something more serious because…because I really like him…What if he doesn’t want that? What if I ruin everything and he runs away from me and I lose him?” he eventually asked quietly. It was so hard to get all of this out and he could only imagine how much harder he’d find it to say it to Aaron.

Vic blew out a long breath. “If you keep going on as you are, you’re going to lose him eventually anyway,” she said. “If you take the risk and tell him how you feel about him, at least you’ll know one way or another how _he_ feels about _you_. And from what you’ve told me, it sounds like he likes you a lot too, you know. But if you keep pretending it’s nothing serious, eventually someone will come along that can admit that they want to have a serious relationship with him and if he thinks you’re only with him for sex, he’s going to take that offer and you’ll be left broken-hearted because you left it too late to actually tell him how you feel. Do you really want to take that chance?”

Robert looked at her a little wide-eyed. The thought of Aaron meeting someone else and disappearing from his life was too awful to consider. His little sister was talking a lot of sense.

“When did you get so wise?” he asked with a small smile on his face.

“I’ve always been the brains of the family,” she replied brightly. “So does this mean you’re going to take my advice and actually talk to him about how you feel?”

The smile on Robert’s face widened. The thought of it made him incredibly nervous and his heart started pounding just at the idea, but he knew what he had to do. It was time to stop being such a coward about how he felt. “Yeah,” he breathed out. “I think I am.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh and if you don’t get the 'Diet Coke' reference, just do a google image search for the Diet Coke man or the Diet Coke advert and all will become clear!


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're near the end now. Thank you so much for all of the lovely feedback and kudos I've received so far. You're the best!

“I’m sorry, mate,” Adam said for what was possibly the hundredth time that evening. “I really thought he liked you.”

“Yeah, well, we were both wrong then, weren’t we?” Aaron grunted in response.

He’d been round at Adam’s since lunch because he’d just needed to talk to someone about how everything had gone so incredibly wrong. Adam had been doing his best to cheer him up, but so far he’d been unsuccessful.

The day before, Aaron had gone over to Adam’s for a long overdue evening of eating takeaway, playing on the X-box, and just generally messing about and winding each other up. They’d finished their four-day shift rotation and were looking forward to four days of no work, so on their first free evening they’d arranged to finally get together for their lads’ night.

They’d only been staring at the screen for a short while when Adam had launched into winding Aaron up about how they never got to do this anymore because Aaron was so loved up with Robert that they spent every free moment together. The comments had left Aaron spluttering in denial and arguing that that wasn’t the case, but Adam hadn’t relented.

At first, it had seemed like some harmless ribbing, but suddenly Adam’s face had grown serious and he’d asked Aaron what was actually going on between him and Robert, how _serious_ was it, wasn’t it time they talked about what their relationship actually _meant_ to them both? And Aaron hadn’t known how to respond to those sorts of questions. Maybe because he couldn’t bring himself to pretend anymore. Maybe because he was starting to realise that Robert meant a lot more to him than he’d been willing to admit so far.

When he’d confided that to his friend, albeit rather haltingly and struggling with how to put it into words, Adam had immediately told him that he needed to tell Robert how he felt. And even though Aaron was unsure about it, and scared of what Robert might say, or that he might get rejected, he couldn’t help but smile at the thought that if he spoke to Robert, the other man might just share the same feelings.

Adam had been absolutely sure that Robert felt the same. “I’ve seen the way he looks at you, mate,” he’d said with a beaming smile on his face. “He’s got it bad.”

In fact, his best friend was so determined that he talk to Robert about his feelings, that he’d cancelled X-box night there and then, and practically shooed Aaron out of the door so he could go straight over to Robert’s and talk to him. Aaron had been shaking his head in bewilderment at Adam’s sudden penchant for match-making, whilst smiling softly to himself at the prospect of actually telling Robert how he felt and hopefully hearing the words repeated back to him.

He'd raced over to Robert’s flat and instead of waiting for the lift, because he was far too wound up for that, he’d taken the stairs up to Robert’s floor. When he’d stepped through the doors from the stairwell, he’d heard Robert’s voice as he spoke to whoever it was he was with. For a heart-stopping moment, Aaron thought that maybe Robert had met someone and brought them back to his flat, but then wanted to kick himself for being so daft when he’d peered round the corner and seen Robert, laden down with grocery bags, chatting to a woman that Aaron recognised from the photos in Robert’s flat. It was Robert’s sister: Victoria.

He’d contemplated walking right up to them and introducing himself, just so he could enjoy Robert squirming, but then he’d heard his own name mentioned and paused. He’d known he shouldn’t be eavesdropping but the temptation was too great.  

When Vic had said the words, ‘ _my brother’s boyfriend’_ , Aaron’s heart had jolted in his chest and he smiled widely to himself, only to have the feeling dashed away almost as quickly as it had arrived, by Robert’s immediate denial that that’s what they were.

For a moment, Aaron hadn’t heard any further words as he tried to shake the disappointment he felt and reason away Robert’s words, but then he’d tuned back in to what was being said. If he’d thought it was bad to hear Robert saying he wasn’t his boyfriend, it was so much worse when Robert answered his sister’s questions by saying he didn’t do feelings ‘ _especially with Aaron’_ , like there was something particularly bad about having feelings for him. And then, the final blow had come: ‘ _he’s just my mate’._ Aaron had actually shaken his head and staggered back a little at the words, feeling like someone had punched him in the gut. The door of Robert’s flat had closed with a thump and Aaron had been left standing in the hallway feeling like a fool.

Somehow, he’d made it back to his own flat. He couldn’t remember much of the journey, but just knew he was incredibly grateful when he’d shut the door behind him. He’d made himself a cup of tea and then sat on his sofa wondering where he’d gone wrong.

It had taken him so long to finally accept that he cared about Robert as so much more than a friend who he slept with and as soon as he’d allowed himself to feel anything more, it had all gone to shit and he’d been left feeling like Robert had stomped all over his heart. From the moment they’d met they’d known what they were to one another. They were friends who fucked – that was all. He couldn’t believe he’d allowed himself to lose sight of that. How had he allowed himself to fall for someone who clearly wasn’t interested in anything more than fucking? How could he have got it so wrong?

Had he imagined all of those nights when Robert had held him in his arms with such care? Had he misinterpreted the times when Robert had looked at him so fondly? What about all of the genuinely sweet things that Robert had done for him? The staying up all night just so they could have breakfast after his shift? The gentle way he’d been there for him after the call out that had ended so badly?

How could he have been so stupid?

He’d cursed himself as he felt his anger growing. He hadn’t even been sure who he was angrier with: Robert or himself. It wasn’t Robert’s fault that Aaron had got the wrong idea and allowed himself to fall far too hard for him. But it _was_ Robert’s fault that he’d so successfully led Aaron on. He was obviously a good actor if he’d faked all of the times when he’d looked like he was falling for Aaron just as hard. Maybe that was his way of keeping Aaron around. Maybe Robert enjoyed the sex they had so much that he didn’t want to give up having Aaron practically on call anytime he fancied a shag.

By the time Aaron had finished stewing on everything, and picking apart every moment looking for an ulterior motive, he was practically vibrating with pent up anger and hurt. Robert had hurt him, but he wasn’t about to let the other man see that. If Robert wanted to continue their ‘relationship’ (he’d scoffed at the word as he’d heard it in his head), he’d have to start playing by Aaron’s rules from now on.

“So I guess you’re not going to be seeing him anymore then,” Adam stated as he frowned at his friend.

Aaron gave him a disbelieving look. “Why wouldn’t I?” he asked snappily. “If he just wants to do the sex thing, that’s fine by me.”

Adam’s eyes widened in shock. “Mate. Don’t you think that’s going to be pretty tough on you? You don’t have to keep seeing him, you know. Wouldn’t it be better to just end it now and go your separate ways? Forget about him?”

The thought of ‘forgetting’ about Robert actually made Aaron’s stomach flip uncomfortably, but he wasn’t going to admit that. He had to deal with this.

“Why would I deny myself a great shag?” he asked, trying to sound flippant. “I’ll keep seeing him – for now. Someone else will come along eventually and then we’ll call it quits. But I might as well keep seeing him. I don’t want to cut my nose off to spite my face, do I?” He tried for a laugh, but his best friend just frowned at him again. Clearly, Adam knew him too well.

“You don’t have to prove anything, you know?” Adam said kindly. “If it’s going to hurt you to spend time with him…”

“It’s not,” Aaron snapped again. He quickly pushed the anger and pain away, forcing a smile onto his face.  “It’ll be fine. It’s only temporary anyway. And besides, maybe I’ll have some fun if I make him work for it.”

Adam still didn’t look convinced, but he didn’t argue any further and Aaron was glad. Making himself believe it was hard enough, without having to convince his best friend too.

***

“Oh, _God_! Yes, Aaron. Ah!” Robert’s shouts rose above the sound of skin slapping against skin as Aaron thrust into him from behind. Robert started to shudder and Aaron knew he was going to come. He continued to slam into Robert, wanting his own release as desperately as he always did, and it didn’t take long before the clenching of Robert’s muscles around him brought him to his own orgasm.

They both collapsed against Robert’s mattress, covered in sweat and panting heavily.

“Well, that was an unexpected, but extremely satisfying, start to the evening,” Robert said once he’d caught his breath.

Aaron had shown up at Robert’s flat not long after he’d got home from work. Seeing as he was off shift for a few days, that hadn’t been that much of a surprise to Robert, but he’d been completely caught off guard when Aaron had grabbed hold of him, steered him into his bedroom, and proceeded to fuck him into the mattress.

Robert rolled onto his side and smiled at Aaron dopily. Aaron felt himself smiling back, but he suddenly remembered that he wasn’t here for that anymore. He couldn’t let himself get any deeper into this than he already was.

Just as Robert reached out for him, Aaron moved off the bed and stood up. He started looking around for his underwear, which had been thrown somewhere along with the rest of his clothes as he’d stripped off.

“I thought I’d make bolognaise for tea,” Robert said from the bed.

Aaron didn’t look up at him as he pulled his boxers on. He just couldn’t bring himself to do it. It was all too domestic. If he and Robert were just ‘mates’ then they shouldn’t be cooking meals together, fitting into a little routine as they worked alongside one another in the kitchen.

“Not tonight,” he grunted, before he grabbed his jeans off the floor.

“Oh, okay,” Robert replied. “D’you fancy a takeaway then?”

Keeping his eyes focused on his clothes or the floor as he got dressed, Aaron shook his head. “I’m heading to the pub to meet the lads.”

“Oh,” Robert said simply and Aaron finally chanced a look in his direction. Robert was sitting up in bed, the sheets pooled around his waist as he looked at Aaron with a slightly confused (and was that hurt?) expression on his face. “Are you coming back later, then?” he asked when they made eye contact. He sounded a little unsure of himself.  

Drawing in a deep breath, Aaron forced himself to stick to the plan. He needed to be strong and not let Robert think he was some pining, love-struck loser who was just going to hang around for any attention he could get from the other man. But at the same time, he couldn’t help but think how cruel he was being and how bad it looked – he’d basically turned up for a shag and was walking out like Robert was nothing more than a one-night stand. No, he needed to stop second guessing himself. This was what Robert wanted. He’d said so, hadn’t he?

“Nah,” he said with a shrug, trying to come off as casual. “Dunno what time we’ll get finished up at the pub and I fancy a lie-in tomorrow, so no point coming back is there?”

Something flickered across Robert’s face, but it was so fleeting that Aaron couldn’t pinpoint what emotion it had been. It looked an awful lot like pain, but he doubted it. Robert didn’t do the whole feelings thing, did he? It was more likely that it was annoyance that Aaron was ditching him for a night out with his mates. Maybe he was jealous again.

Aaron was fully clothed again and pulling on his shoes, when Robert finally moved from his bed. He pulled on his boxers and his jumper and then stood watching Aaron for a moment. His hands were twisting in the hem of his jumper, but he didn’t speak.

“Right, I’ll text you tomorrow,” Aaron said with a smile. He walked over to Robert, and before he could remind himself that he wasn’t doing that sort of thing anymore, he’d pressed a kiss to Robert’s cheek.

Robert smiled at him, although it looked like an effort, and wished him a pleasant evening, before turning his back as Aaron walked out of the bedroom and out of the flat. When the door closed behind him, Aaron blew out a long breath. That had been even harder than he’d expected.

***

The last couple of weeks had been weird. Aaron had tried really hard to keep things ‘casual’ between himself and Robert. It was harder than he’d anticipated. It was hard to go from the blissful domesticity that he hadn’t even realised they’d slipped in to, to trying to keep Robert at arm’s length.

He’d come up with various excuses about why he couldn’t see Robert on several evenings when the other man had asked him if they were going to get together. He thought he could almost detect the disappointment in the tone of Robert’s replies when Aaron had sent him yet another reason why he was too busy to pop over. At first he wondered if there was something more to it, but he’d angrily reminded himself that Robert wasn’t interested in anything other than being ‘mates’. God, he was starting to despise that word. He’d heard it repeated in his head so many times as he replayed the conversation he’d overheard, over and over again.

The problem was that they’d slipped so easily into something that felt like more than just ‘friends with benefits’. They’d spent nearly every night together in the weeks before Aaron had overheard Robert talking with his sister, seemingly without making any conscious decision to do so. They’d just gravitated towards one another and been so lost in one another that they hadn’t even realised how much time they were spending together. So now that he was trying to avoid such ‘soppy, coupley’ behaviour, as he was describing it in his head, he was finding it tough. 

The temptation to fall asleep in Robert’s arms was probably the hardest thing to resist. He’d never had any trouble sleeping and when he’d started falling asleep with Robert that hadn’t changed. Somehow he felt even more comfortable in bed with Robert there, and waking up with him was just something wonderful. He’d tried to make himself stop doing it. But it was so hard. That first time he’d walked out on Robert after they’d had sex had left him feeling like shit, but he forced himself to do it a few more times since. Each time, Robert had looked at him with something like hurt in his eyes as he’d pulled his clothes on and made some excuse about why he couldn’t stay. It was so awful that he’d only managed to see it through a few times. Every other time he’d contemplated getting out of bed and walking away from Robert, one look at the man beside him had made him lie back against his pillow and allow Robert to cuddle up against him.

Adam had been badgering him constantly for the last few weeks about how he didn’t think it was a good idea for him to keep spending time with Robert when it was clear that Robert wasn’t interested in anything serious. He couldn’t understand why Aaron kept going back for more, why Aaron was happy to screw Robert when he was secretly wishing for something more.

Aaron wasn’t ‘happy’ about the situation. Not at all, really. But he just couldn’t bear the thought of letting Robert go. Not yet.

It was Adam, in the end, who made Aaron do something that he hadn’t even considered before.

All of his constant questions and concerned looks were pissing Aaron off and he couldn’t help but snap at his friend about it. He couldn’t deal with Adam fussing as well as how his feelings about Robert were all completely messed up in his head. Adam kept telling him that he needed to move on and stop wasting time on Robert when he clearly didn’t care about him in the same way. He’d said it so many times that Aaron was sure he’d be hearing it in his sleep.

So when a fit bloke that Adam had trained with turned up at the fire station one day to catch up with his friend, and Adam was being less than subtle about how his friend was gay and available, Aaron had actually accepted when Ed invited him out for a drink just to shut Adam up.

As soon as Ed had left the station, Aaron had considered cancelling their meeting, but Adam had been insistent that he had to go, it was a good thing, and maybe it would help Aaron to see that there were blokes out there other than Robert Sugden. Aaron had reluctantly accepted his advice and then wondered what Robert would say because he knew he was going to tell him. Deep in his heart, he hoped that it would make Robert jealous and he’d realise that he didn’t want Aaron seeing anyone else because he wanted Aaron all to himself, forever. He’d been jealous over Aaron simply talking to Jackson so surely him going on a date with someone else would be too much. But then, as always it seemed these days, he shook the idea away and made himself face facts. Even if Robert was jealous about it, it was probably just because he didn’t like to share and certainly wouldn’t want to be put on the back-burner for someone else in Aaron’s life.

Maybe Adam was right. As much as he didn’t want to accept it, maybe it was time he moved on.

***

Aaron had been feeling antsy since he’d arrived at Robert’s flat the night before. He’d not slept all that well, waking up constantly throughout the night, and the feeling of something heavy in his chest hadn’t shifted by the morning.

They’d both woken up and gone through the motions of getting ready for work. Aaron knew he had to tell Robert about his date with Ed seeing as it was that night, but actually getting the words out was something he was finding rather challenging. He just didn’t know how to bring it up.

In the end, Robert solved the problem for him. “Are you coming over after your shift?” he asked as he finished fiddling with his tie.

Aaron looked up at him from his position sitting on the bed tying his boots up, his heart suddenly beating faster. “I can’t,” he said simply, and before Robert could speak again, he continued. “I’ve, er, I’ve actually got a date.” He tried to make his voice sound carefree like it was no big deal, but he wasn’t sure how convincing he was.

There was silence for a moment and Aaron glanced up at Robert to gauge his reaction. Their eyes met and, for a moment, Aaron thought he saw tears, and he was about to speak again, tell Robert he’d cancel the stupid date if he wanted him to, but then the moment was gone and Robert was smirking at him. The smile on his face looked off somehow and Aaron couldn’t see much of the man he cared so much about behind the grin.

“Good for you,” Robert commented. He turned back to the mirror and focused on his tie again, although it looked perfectly alright from where Aaron was sitting. “Anyone I know?” he asked casually.

Aaron couldn’t quite wrap his mind around what was going on. He’d felt sure that Robert would react with jealousy, but this almost seemed like he _wanted_ Aaron to go out with another bloke. He was being so flippant about it.

“No, no-one you know,” he replied. “He used to train with Adam so we met through him. He’s been working in France for a while and he’s just moved back.” He watched Robert closely for some reaction, but there didn’t seem to be anything obvious.

Robert turned to him suddenly and smiled again. “Right. Sounds good,” he declared.

His voice sounded a little off and Aaron suddenly wanted to scream at him that they needed to sort this out, but Robert was walking purposefully out of the bedroom. Aaron followed him towards the kitchen where Robert picked up some papers from the table, shoved them into his laptop bag and made his way to the door of the flat. “Look, I’ve gotta go, so I’ll…um…I’ll see you around. You can lock up for me, yeah?”

Aaron opened his mouth to speak, to stop Robert leaving.

“Have a good time tonight, mate,” Robert said as he pulled the door open.

Aaron’s mouth snapped shut. He watched Robert leave and the door closed behind him. “Cheers, _mate_ ,” he muttered to the empty kitchen.

***

The thing was, Ed was a really nice bloke. He was very sweet and seemed like a real gentleman. They’d had a laugh and shared stories about work. Aaron had genuinely been interested in Ed’s tales of working for the fire brigade in Paris; his life out there sounded like an adventure and Aaron wondered why Ed had wanted to return to England.

The evening had gone well and Aaron knew that Ed was the sort of guy that his mum would approve of. He could just hear her voice in his head encouraging him to give Ed a chance.

The problem was that Ed didn’t ignite any of the spark that Robert did in Aaron. The passion that Aaron felt when he was with Robert wasn’t there and he couldn’t see it ever being there. The way that he missed Robert when they hadn’t seen each other for a few days, the way Robert could turn him on with just a look, the way they teased one another, the way Robert made him feel with the simplest of touches. And not just in a sexual way, but in all the little ways he’d made Aaron feel special and cared for. Even if none of it had meant anything to Robert, it meant something to Aaron.

Maybe it was early days and maybe he should have been more willing to give Ed a chance but he just couldn’t do it. Right now, he couldn’t see himself dating anyone else. He knew he was being dramatic but he couldn’t see himself ever feeling that passion with anyone else. Robert had ruined everything for him.

They left the pub and walked along the street side by side. Aaron was dreading having some awkward moment outside his flat when Ed might expect to be invited in and Aaron would have to reject him. He hated stuff like that.

There was silence between them for a while and when they reached the traffic lights they paused and looked at one another. Ed smiled gently.

“Look, my place is that way,” he gestured over his shoulder, “so I’m gonna head off.”

Aaron wasn’t big-headed but he’d expected Ed to want to go back to his for _something_ , so he was pretty shocked at the words. The feeling must have shown on his face because Ed chuckled a little.

“I think you’re a great bloke, Aaron, and maybe in a different time or place this might have worked, but I don’t think you’re really interested in me.”

Aaron opened his mouth to say something but didn’t know what he would have said.

“It’s okay,” Ed continued. “I got the feeling there was something going on – Adam’s not exactly subtle, is he? But I could tell tonight that your head’s elsewhere. I hope you don’t mind me saying so, but I don’t think you’re ready to move on from whoever it is you’re hung up on yet.”

Aaron felt his cheeks heat as Ed spoke. Was he really that obvious? “I’m not…” he started, wanting to protest the words. “I didn’t mean to waste your evening,” he said quietly. Ed was a nice bloke and Aaron felt bad.

“You didn’t,” Ed replied easily. “I had a good time. And if you get over this guy, maybe we’ll go out again some time.” He smiled and bid Aaron goodbye before wandering off down the street.

Aaron blew out a long, frustrated sigh and ran a hand over his face. Bloody Robert Sugden.

***

Aaron had had a long conversation with Adam about what had happened and the problem of how, as Ed had put it, he was ‘hung up’ on Robert. He just couldn’t get Robert out of his system. Adam had quite rightly pointed out that Aaron was going to find it hard to get over Robert if he was constantly seeing him and sleeping with him, and Aaron had started to realise that he was right. He just couldn’t carry on with the casual, no feelings charade.

“I don’t think I can do this anymore,” he’d confessed to his best friend.

Adam had given him an understanding look. “Then don’t,” he’d said simply. “It’s not worth it.”

And maybe he was right. Aaron couldn’t handle seeing Robert all the time and pretending all of it meant nothing to him. He was sick of acting like all he wanted was sex and he was content with knowing they’d never be anything more. He wanted Robert; God, he wanted him. He wanted to wake up with him whenever he could, but that obviously wasn’t meant to be and he couldn’t keep putting himself through this pain.

They’d already been seeing less of one another over the last few weeks and Aaron decided that he needed to step back even further for his own sanity. He couldn’t bring himself to completely walk away from Robert – not yet. He wasn’t ready to let him go completely. But their interactions and their meetings had definitely become a trickle rather than a torrent.

The last time that Aaron had seen Robert, nearly a week ago at his flat, Robert had looked tired. There were dark shadows under his eyes like he hadn’t been sleeping and Aaron had wanted to ask if he was alright. When they’d both come and were laid next to one another in Robert’s bed, Robert had pulled him close, spooning up behind him and nuzzling against the skin behind his ear, breathing deeply. He’d wrapped his arms so tightly around Aaron and fallen asleep pressed against him, so Aaron had no chance of moving out of the bed and leaving even if he had the will to do so. Robert had looked so tired that he didn’t have the heart to disturb him now that he was actually sleeping soundly. And even though he didn’t want to, Aaron had to admit, he’d slept better wrapped in Robert’s arms too.

Aaron was worried about him, of course he was, but then he reminded himself that it wasn’t his place to be worried about Robert like that. So in the morning, when Robert had slowly blinked awake and smiled gently at him, Aaron had forced himself to get out of bed and leave, before Robert’s charms broke him down all over again.

Every time he walked away, he told himself it was going to be the last time. He’d text Robert and tell him he wouldn’t be seeing him again. Even though they’d become friends, it was better to have a clean break, a fresh start. He just found it impossible to stick to that plan.

One thought kept running through his mind on a loop: if it was never supposed to be anything serious, why did it hurt so damn much now that it felt like it was ending?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m so sorry about that – I don’t think it was what anyone was expecting after the ending of the last chapter! I’d done so well with the fluff and then I just couldn’t resist some angst. One more chapter to go…


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry for the delay in updating this final chapter – real life has been busy of late. But to make up for that, this chapter is the longest of all and hopefully what you wanted! Thank you so much for all of the lovely feedback on this story. I’ve thoroughly enjoyed writing it – I hope you’ve enjoyed reading it. As always, feedback is greatly appreciated.

Robert rubbed at his sore, gritty eyes and then poured the boiled water into his mug. He stared out of the window down onto the street below and lost himself in his thoughts. It seemed to be happening quite a bit recently, the drifting off into his own head and just _thinking_. It was worst at night when he had nothing else to occupy his mind and he just laid in his bed wondering where he’d gone wrong.

He hadn’t been sleeping well for a few weeks and he felt exhausted. When he’d seen his sister, she’d looked at him in concern and nagged at him to tell her what was wrong, but he couldn’t find the words to say. And he didn’t feel like he had any right to anyway. What he’d had with Aaron had never been anything formal, they’d never given it a name, so he didn’t have any right to be mourning the loss of their relationship. Because it hadn’t ever _been_ one. Except the problem was it felt an awful lot like a break-up to Robert.

Robert had noticed changes in Aaron gradually over the weeks. It had started on the night that Aaron had disappeared off to the pub after screwing him without giving Robert a second thought, and things had gone downhill since then.

That night, the one that Robert still felt hurt about, he’d planned to sit Aaron down and have ‘the conversation’ with him. His talk with Vic had convinced him that it was a good idea. He’d been dreading it and relishing the prospect in equal measure. His nerves had been all over the place and he’d even rehearsed how he planned to start the conversation. He was going to ask Aaron if they could become official; he wanted to call Aaron his boyfriend because he cared about him as so much more than just a fuck-buddy and he wanted them to be together properly.

He’d been all psyched up ready for it, but the moment that Aaron had walked through the door, something had seemed off. He hadn’t been himself, but before Robert had had chance to ask if he was alright, Aaron had dragged him off to the bedroom. Robert, not being one to turn down a shag, hadn’t put up any resistance and they’d had fantastic sex as always. But it was the minutes afterwards that had brought everything crashing down around him. Aaron’s almost cold dismissal of him as he’d announced that he was off to the pub and wouldn’t be coming back had left Robert feeling shocked and, if he was being honest, used. He actually felt like Aaron had turned up, used him for a quick fuck and walked out because he had better things to do than hang around with Robert, and Robert had never in his life felt quite so hurt.

That was where it had started, but since then there had been all sorts of weird things, like Aaron making up excuses about why he couldn’t come over or why he couldn’t stay if he did come round. He’d been distant at times and yet in other moments he’d clung to Robert as tightly as ever and looked at him just how he had not so long ago.

Of course Robert had worried that Aaron had somehow caught wind of his feelings and it had freaked him out. Maybe he’d seen something on Robert’s face as he’d looked at him that had given him away. Robert had panicked. And he’d immediately assumed that that was why Aaron was being so weird. So, in order to keep things from becoming messy and confusing and too much for Aaron (who clearly wasn’t interested in anything serious), Robert had started to pull back a little. If he kept his distance, hopefully he wouldn’t scare Aaron away completely.

Because he wasn’t ready to let Aaron go.

If Aaron had started to realise that Robert had proper, serious feelings for him, and it had freaked him out, Robert was willing to do whatever it took to hang on to him, at least for now. Even if that meant he had to accept that he’d see less of Aaron as the other man got over his fear that Robert was about to make some grand gesture of commitment, then so be it. He’d take what he could get. And if that made him desperate, well, no-one else needed to know what was going on so no-one could judge him.

That had been the plan anyway. Things had gone awry when Aaron had announced, with no sign of any thought to Robert’s feelings, that he was going on a date with someone else. Robert had been crushed by the news, but he’d put on a brave front as always, shrugged it off and even managed to wish Aaron a good night. The words had felt like poison on his tongue as he’d forced them out and swallowed down the bile in his throat.

And, of course, Aaron’s date would have to have been with some bloody fireman, who was probably all hunky and gorgeous and they’d have loads in common and why wouldn’t Aaron ditch Robert for someone like that? Robert’s thoughts had run away with him and he’d spent the night of Aaron’s date getting drunk on his own in his flat in order to block out the image of Aaron with some hot bloke.

It was stupid really. Robert was trying to keep his distance so as not to scare Aaron away, but he knew he was failing as he felt like he was losing him more and more each day anyway.

He suddenly snapped out of his trance and fished the teabag out of his mug. It had probably been in there too long, he seemed to be doing that a lot recently, and his tea was probably going to be foul, but once he allowed himself to slip into thinking about Aaron he seemed to lose track of time.

What he really needed was a good night’s sleep. He was so tired and everything felt like an effort. He knew he had dark shadows under his eyes and other people had noticed and asked if he was alright. He even thought that Aaron had been looking at him with worry on his face the last time he’d seen him, but the moment had gone and anything that Aaron might have said went with it. In fact, he hadn’t slept properly since that night, when Aaron had actually stayed over instead of disappearing as soon as they’d finished shagging.

Robert carried his tea through to the living room and flicked the TV on. The BBC news was just finishing as he settled himself onto the sofa. He stared at the screen blankly as the adverts between programmes played out and then the local news came on. One moment he was sitting staring at the TV numbly, and the next he was desperately grabbing the remote and turning the sound up as images of a smouldering building appeared on the screen.

The reporter was standing in front of a cordon, the dark smoke behind her rising from the wreckage of the building over her shoulder. She spoke of a massive fire that had been reported earlier on in the evening at a warehouse on the outskirts of Leeds: the fire had been so large that several crews had been called in to deal with it as it burned out of control. She talked about part of the building collapsing and how there were paramedics attending. Thankfully, the fire had been extinguished but the damage it had caused was visible behind her as she spoke.

Robert knew that Aaron would probably be there at the scene. Of course he knew that Aaron was working; he knew his shift patterns off by heart these days. But he had his suspicions confirmed when the reporter turned to interview someone and the camera panned to Aaron’s watch manager.

The man looked grim as the reporter asked him for an update. He told her that there were casualties and there were missing members of the fire crew and Robert’s heart plummeted. He stood up and began pacing in front of the television.

“No, no, no.” He shook his head in disbelief as he moved. This couldn’t be happening again. It couldn’t be happening to another person he loved.

He came to an abrupt halt. His world seemed to freeze and in a moment of absolute clarity he realised everything that he’d been trying to deny for all this time, everything he’d been too scared to admit.

He loved Aaron. He was _in love_ with Aaron.

“ _Shit_ ,” he breathed out as he sank down onto the sofa again and fixed his eyes back onto the screen.

He couldn’t really focus as the revelation, ‘I love Aaron, I’m _in love_ with Aaron’ played on a loop in his head, but he caught snatches of information from the report on the news. Mentions of the collapse and a rescue and recovery operation blared out at him and he shuddered at the knowledge that ‘recovery’ was what they did when they retrieved bodies from an incident.

He couldn’t focus on any of it – he just wanted Aaron.     

He didn’t know what to do. It wasn’t like he could ring Aaron and if he was attending the scene he wouldn’t have his phone on him anyway. He resumed pacing as he ran his hand through his hair in agitation.

The news programme ended, with a reminder of the headline about the fire which just felt like a kick to the teeth, and Robert hadn’t sat down at all. He decided to call the fire station because he just didn’t know what else to do.

The woman that answered his call sounded harassed and she bluntly told him that she couldn’t discuss Aaron or any of the other members of the crew unless he was a family member. In the end he settled for pleading with her to at least tell him if the crew had attended the warehouse fire and she reluctantly admitted that they had. Robert’s stomach flipped over as he heard the confirmation. He managed to thank her before ending the call and staring at the wall.

Aaron will be fine. He’ll be helping with the aftermath and the clear up at the scene and then he’ll be back at the station with his friends and everything will be fine. Robert kept trying to repeat it to himself and make himself believe it, but it wasn’t really working.

A few anxious hours dragged by and eventually Robert had had enough. Grabbing his phone, he quickly found Aaron’s number and dialled. He resumed his pacing as he moved agitatedly across his living room. The call rang and rang, and Aaron didn’t answer. He growled in frustration as the voicemail message kicked in. He debated leaving a message, but he didn’t even know what to say so he hung up instead.

Shouldn’t Aaron have been back at the fire station by now? Surely his crew didn’t have anything else to do at the scene seeing as the fire had been dealt with hours ago. If he was back at the station, surely he’d be able to answer his phone. But what if he was hurt? That was what Robert had so desperately been trying to avoid thinking about for the last few hours. He hadn’t been very successful as every time he pictured Aaron, an image of his mum’s terrified face had flashed through his mind and he couldn’t help but fear the worst. He knew he shouldn’t compare the two situations, but he couldn’t stop himself from mixing the most painful memories of his mother with the fact that Aaron might be lying in a hospital somewhere with terrible injuries, or worse.

What if he was dead?

Robert choked on his own breath as he tried to pull air into his lungs. He leant against the back of his sofa in an attempt to steady himself. He couldn’t do this. He couldn’t deal with the thought of losing Aaron.

Pushing himself away from the sofa, he stood up straight and dialled Aaron’s number again. “ _Please_ ,” he whispered as the call rang out. “Please answer. Please just be alright.”

Aaron’s voicemail message played again.

“Shit,” Robert breathed out. He squeezed his phone tightly in his fist as he fought against the urge to cry.

***

Another hour had gone by painfully slowly and Robert had lost track of how many times he’d tried calling Aaron. In the end, he gave up and practically ran out of his flat and to his car. The last few hours of worry had left him frantic and he didn’t know what else to do, so he drove over to Aaron’s flat as quickly as he could. If Aaron wasn’t at home, he was going to drive to the fire station and demand answers whether he was family or not.

After parking haphazardly outside, Robert sprinted up the stairs in Aaron’s block of flats. He was breathing heavily by the time he stopped outside Aaron’s door but he didn’t even notice. He hammered on the door and waited impatiently, shifting his weight from one foot to the other as he stood there.

He was about to give up and walk away when the door was suddenly yanked open.

Aaron was standing there staring at him in shock.

Robert stared back.

Neither of them moved or spoke as the seconds ticked by.

“Thank God you’re alright,” Robert eventually said quietly. Then his eyes scanned Aaron properly and he noticed the bruise forming on his cheek and the graze beneath the stubble on his chin. “ _Are_ you alright?” he asked. He moved forward and his hand started to reach out seemingly without him even thinking about it, but Aaron took a tiny step back and his eyes fell to the floor. Robert’s arm lowered and, for the first time ever in Aaron’s presence, he felt nervous and unsure of himself.

“Look,” Aaron sighed, and Robert couldn’t help but think that he sounded exhausted, “if this is some sort of booty-call or whatever, I’m really not up for it.”

Robert’s heart stuttered in his chest. Did Aaron really think that that was the only reason he’d be there? For a shag? Did he think so little of Robert after all this time? He swallowed down the hurt he felt and the snappy response that came to him, knowing that Aaron had obviously had a tough shift. “That’s not why I’m here,” he said. “I saw the news. The fire at the warehouse was on and they said that there were injured firefighters and I was worried about you.”

Aaron looked up at him sharply at the words. He looked at Robert with what seemed like confusion on his face before he shook his head slightly and sighed. He held the door open wider to allow Robert to pass through and Robert took his chance. He didn’t want to stand on Aaron’s doorstep and try to have some deep conversation with him. And his main priority was actually making sure that Aaron was alright.

They made their way into the kitchen and then stood at opposite sides of the room: Aaron leaning against the sink, while Robert stood in the doorway. Aaron was staring down at his feet and stretching his jumper down over his hands – a sure sign that he was agitated or upset about something, Robert thought to himself, and then wanted to slap himself for not realising how deep his feelings ran before now. He knew Aaron so well: he knew his quirks and tells, the little twitches that gave him away, the times he thought he was being sneaky, but he couldn’t hide from Robert, and the times when he was grumpy but just needed a teasing remark or a gentle touch to bring him round. This was one of those moments when Aaron wasn’t going to talk first. If Robert wanted anything from him, he’d have to initiate the conversation.

“Aaron,” he said gently, “what happened tonight?”

It took a few moments but Aaron looked up at him eventually. His eyes were wide and swimming with tears that threatened to fall, but he scrubbed at his face roughly before they could. He stared out of the window instead of looking at Robert as he spoke.  “I…look, you don’t have to do this…you can go. You’ve seen that I’m alright. I’m in one piece. You don’t have to…”

“But I want to,” Robert interrupted him. “Come on, Aaron. Talk to me.” Despite Aaron’s insistence that he was ‘alright’, Robert could tell that he needed to talk this through and do something other than sit in silence all evening _thinking_ about whatever had happened.

Finally, Aaron looked back at him. He just gazed at him for a while before he drew in a deep breath and began to speak. “We went out for the call-out to the warehouse. There were loads of crews in attendance because it was such a massive fire. There were reports of people being trapped inside so we suited up and went in. It all seemed like a routine search but then…there was this explosion and part of the roof came down and the next thing I knew I was on the floor.”

He paused for a moment and Robert so desperately wanted to go to him, to hold him, but he didn’t want to take away from Aaron needing this time just to talk. He didn’t want to muddy the waters with what his intentions were. So he stayed put. He didn’t move towards Aaron no matter how much he wanted to pull him into his arms. He just watched him and let him continue.

“Adam was right next to me - he was down too. For a moment…” he broke off and swallowed thickly. “For a moment, I thought he was dead. He was so still and I could see his face through his mask…his eyes were shut and he had blood on his face. I thought he was dead,” he repeated and a tear rolled down his cheek at the memory of that terrible moment.

It had taken all of Robert’s strength to stay where he was as Aaron spoke, but seeing Aaron so distressed obliterated what remained of his will-power. He crossed the kitchen in a few strides and pulled Aaron into his arms, letting him press his face against his shoulder and breathe deeply as he let go of some of the emotion that had obviously been building within him since the fire.

When Aaron had composed himself a little, he pulled back slightly from Robert’s embrace. “I pulled him out and the paramedics took him to the hospital. My boss wanted me to get checked out too, even though I was alright, so I went down to the hospital and then I went to see how Adam was doing.”

“And?” Robert asked immediately. He was almost surprised about how desperate he was to know that Adam was going to be okay. He liked the other man and he knew how much Aaron loved his best friend – he knew that if anything happened to Adam, Aaron would take it hard. That had been demonstrated already this evening. “How is he?”

“They’re keeping him in for observation overnight and probably tomorrow. He’s got a bad concussion but nothing that should do him any lasting damage. His skull’s too thick for that.” Aaron smiled weakly, but it didn’t reach his eyes. He’d clearly had a terrible scare and he was still struggling to deal with it.

Robert rubbed his upper arm and smiled softly at him. “Well, I’m glad he’s going to be alright. And I’m glad you’re okay too.” He wanted to kiss him. He really wanted to lean down and press his lips against Aaron’s to help him forget what had happened. He wanted to hold Aaron and let him know that everything was going to be alright. But he couldn’t. He didn’t know if he dared. And he certainly didn’t want Aaron to think that that was the only reason he’d turned up at his flat, despite his earlier words.

Looking at Aaron’s red-rimmed eyes and his exhausted face, Robert decided he couldn’t expect to have a serious conversation about feelings tonight. It wouldn’t be fair of him to drop his emotional epiphany on Aaron tonight after everything that had happened. He could wait.

Taking a slight step back, he nodded once at Aaron. “Look…you’ve had a hell of a night. I should probably head off and leave you to it.”

He took another step backwards, but Aaron reached out for his arm to hold him in place.

“Why did you come here?” Aaron asked quietly.

Nerves suddenly flooded Robert and he felt his heart rate speed up. “I told you. I saw the news and wanted to make sure you were alright. You weren’t answering your phone so I didn’t know what else to do.”

“I left my phone in my locker at work. With everything that was going on I forgot to go back and get it,” Aaron replied. He hadn’t let go of Robert’s arm. He was looking at Robert intently like he was trying to figure something out. “You were worried about me?” he said and it sounded like he was so unsure it made Robert’s chest hurt.

Robert moved closer to Aaron again, stepping into his space so they were mere inches apart. “Of course I was worried about you,” he said quietly, and while he spoke softly there was no denying the strength of his words.

They looked into each other’s eyes for a long moment and Robert swallowed thickly as he made his decision. He could keep running away from this; he could keep pretending that Aaron didn’t mean everything to him. He could make excuse after excuse about how it wasn’t the right time or Aaron wouldn’t want to hear it. But he knew, deep in his heart, that it had to be now. Looking at Aaron’s face, getting lost in his eyes, and then seeing the graze and the bruise on his face, the reminder that if things had been different, if Aaron had been standing in another part of that building, Robert might never have seen those eyes again. It was all too much. He couldn’t risk not telling Aaron the truth – right now. And if Aaron turned him away, told him it meant nothing to him and they could never be anything more, then so be it. At least Robert could walk away knowing he wasn’t a coward, wasn’t afraid of his own feelings. And yes, it would hurt like hell, but Aaron was worth the risk.

It was time to face his fears – all of them. The fear of Aaron rejecting him and the fear of exposing his feelings. The fear of what _might_ happen. He couldn’t live the rest of his life hiding from the ghosts of what had happened in the past. Being with Aaron was enough to make him want to be brave and finally deal with what had happened to his mum. He wanted to take the chance to be with Aaron, share everything with him, because wouldn’t it be better to be with him now than never have the opportunity because he was too afraid? He’d never forgive himself if he walked away again.

“Robert?” Aaron asked quietly, and Robert suddenly realised how long they’d been standing there, how long he’d just been gazing at Aaron’s face.

‘ _Good start_ ,’ he thought to himself before he blew out a long breath.

“I need to talk to you,” he said and he tried for a small smile but he knew it wasn’t his best effort.

Immediately, Aaron looked almost wary and he pulled back from Robert a little, a questioning, yet nervous, expression on his face. “Do we need to sit down?”

“It might be best.” Robert nodded.

They moved through to Aaron’s living room and sat down on the sofa, not close enough to touch, as both of them fidgeted about nervously. There was some tension between them that Robert had never felt before.

“I know,” Robert started and then he stopped and cleared his throat. “I know that things between us have been…different lately.” He was watching Aaron’s reactions closely, hoping to pick up any small signal that he was on the right track. “And I know that you’ve been out on some dates with another bloke.” Aaron’s face scrunched up a little at that and his eyes darted away from Robert’s. “And I know that I’ve…well, I’ve not been very good at letting you know…about, um, how I feel about stuff.” He was cursing himself mentally for being so crap at this. He knew he could charm just about anybody on a good day but this stumbling, stuttering speech was ridiculously bad.   

“It was only one date,” Aaron suddenly blurted out, his eyes wide like he hadn’t planned on saying anything. He looked down at his hands and pulled at the sleeves of his jumper.

Robert smiled softly, even though Aaron wasn’t looking at him. God, he loved him. “I’m glad,” he muttered.

Aaron looked up at him so sharply and he looked almost hurt by Robert’s words. And Robert couldn’t help but let out a little laugh at the expression on his face. “I’ve been so stupid,” Robert said as he shook his head slightly.

There was still a look of confusion on Aaron’s face as he waited for Robert to continue.

“When you said you were going on that date…I didn’t know what to do. I…I thought I’d lost you to someone else, or that I was going to. And I realised that I’ve been scared of losing you for a while now, but I’ve been such an idiot because I never even told you how I felt and then I was scared that I’d lost my chance.”

Holding up a hand to slow Robert down, Aaron frowned at him. “What are you going on about?”

Drawing in a deep breath, Robert knew that it was now or never. He had to say what was in his heart before he actually did lose Aaron.

“Aaron, I want to be with you properly. I don’t want to just be your friend, or someone you sleep with, I want us to be together, as a couple,” he said in a rush. He felt like he wanted to grin manically as soon as the words had spilled from his mouth, but the look on Aaron’s face stopped his giddiness.

Aaron shook his head at him. He pushed himself up from the sofa and took a few steps across the room before he turned back to face Robert.

“Is this some sort of joke?” he asked. Confusion and upset were clear on his face. “Or are you just saying this because you don’t like the idea of me seeing someone else because you’re jealous? Because if that’s what this is, I think you’d better leave. I can’t handle this. I can’t handle you messing me around and stringing me along.”

Robert’s face fell at the words and his heart plummeted to his stomach. Even when he’d been scared that Aaron would reject him, he hadn’t pictured this. “Aaron…” he started, but was cut off before he could get any further.

“No. This isn’t fair,” Aaron said angrily. “You don’t want me, at least not like that. I heard you. I heard you saying that we were just mates, you didn’t want anything serious _especially_ not with me.”

There were tears welling in Aaron’s eyes and Robert desperately wanted to go to him, but he knew he couldn’t, his affection wouldn’t be accepted. And he was confused too.

“What are you talking about?” he asked. “When did I say that?”

“To your sister!” Aaron shouted. He scrubbed at his eyes roughly. “I heard you outside your flat, telling her that you didn’t want me like that. And I know I shouldn’t have been listening but I couldn’t help it and I heard you.”

He trailed off like he didn’t know what else to say and Robert sat in silence staring at him for a moment. He couldn’t believe that Aaron had overheard that stupid conversation when he’d been so in denial, still trying to pretend like he didn’t care about Aaron in that way, that he didn’t _love_ him. He’d been so, so stupid. And he knew that Aaron hadn’t heard the most important part of his chat with Vic.

He pushed himself up from the sofa, but Aaron’s face stopped him from moving towards him.

“I think you’d better go,” he said quietly. “I can’t…I can’t do this.”

Not so long ago, Robert probably would have walked out, too afraid of his own feelings, too scared to take that final step towards giving his heart to someone else. But he wasn’t giving up this time. Aaron meant too much to him to leave now.

“I did say that,” he spoke calmly, hoping that Aaron would listen to him and not throw him out. “But you only heard half of the conversation. You didn’t hear the part where she called me out on all of my bullshit and I realised that I cared about you so much more than I’d been willing to admit. I’ve been a complete wanker about everything and I’m so sorry, Aaron. I’ve been stupid and scared, and I didn’t know how to tell you because I thought you’d run a mile.”

Aaron was watching him closely but his face had softened a little and he looked adorably bewildered by what he was hearing. “But…why did you say that to Vic? You said you didn’t do serious, especially with someone like me.”

Robert winced as he realised how hurtful that must have been. Hearing those harsh words and having absolutely no explanation for them must have been such a terrible blow. “I’m so sorry,” he said again. “That night, after you’d obviously overheard us, I decided that I was going to tell you how I felt. I was going to be honest with you, about everything. I wanted to explain why I was finding it so hard to let you get too close. I just…I never got chance.”

Aaron looked more confused than ever and he stepped closer to Robert. There was something hopeful in his eyes as he looked at him. “Why not?”

Robert actually felt his cheeks heat a little and he looked down at his feet. “You came over the next evening and…as soon as we’d finished in bed…well, you got up and left. You went to the pub with your mates.” He managed to look up after he’d finished speaking and saw Aaron’s eyes widen in shock. He watched the painful realisation of what had happened flash across his face. It seemed that they’d both done a brilliant job of fucking things up.     

“Oh God,” Aaron groaned. “Rob…shit. I’m sorry. I had no idea.”

“I know,” Robert said with a nod. “I get it now. I understand why you were so…weird with me.”

“I should’ve just said something,” Aaron admitted quietly. “But I was scared about how you’d react. And after what I’d heard…I just…well, I thought you’d meant it. And I was angry and upset with you. I shouldn’t have treated you like that. You must have thought I was such a twat.”

Robert chuckled at his words. “I’m sure you were thinking something similar about me. Obviously, neither of us are particularly good at talking about how we feel. I suppose that’s what caused a lot of our trouble – me not being able to talk to you about something.”

A look of curiosity appeared on Aaron’s face. Apparently without even being aware of it, he’d already been inching ever so slightly closer to Robert as they’d been speaking, and now he took an obvious step towards him. “What are you talking about?”

Swallowing thickly, Robert held Aaron’s gaze. “There’s something that I probably should have told you a while ago. It might explain some of the reasons why I’ve been so bad at accepting how I felt about you, but I also know that I can’t use it as an excuse forever. I’ve been so afraid to talk to you about it, afraid that I’d lose you, and…I’m just not very good at talking about it and I’ve never really _had_ to talk about it, at least not to someone I…well, someone I want to be with. I’ve never wanted to open up to anyone about it.”

Aaron had closed the gap between them, a look of concern on his face. “Let’s sit down,” he said calmly as he guided Robert down onto the sofa. He took a seat on the edge of the coffee table so that he was facing Robert straight on. “You can talk to me. Whatever it is, you can tell me.”

Robert blinked a few times, already feeling a stinging sensation in his eyes. “It’s…when I was a kid, my mum…she died.” He stared down at his hands for a moment, but then another set of hands wrapped around his own and he looked up to meet Aaron’s eyes, watching him closely and with so much affection that he drew in a shuddery breath and found the strength to continue. “She was trapped in a barn on the farm where we lived…it was on fire.” Aaron sucked in a sharp breath and his eyes widened a little. “There was nothing we could do and…she died.”

“Oh, Robert,” Aaron said as he squeezed his hands. “I had no idea. I’m so sorry.”

Robert shook his head slightly. He needed to carry on. He needed to say everything that he’d been holding on to and holding back from Aaron. “When we first started meeting up, it didn’t really bother me that you were a firefighter. I didn’t really give it much thought and we weren’t anything serious so it was fine. But then…then I started to see you in a different way and I started to panic that I was having feelings for you. I kept worrying about what might happen to you and what if you got hurt, or worse, in a fire because you were dealing with that every time you went to work and I couldn’t deal with the fear that I might lose you too. I didn’t want to deal with that pain so I kept trying to pretend like we were nothing serious and I didn’t care about you. But I can’t pretend anymore: I don’t want to. Even though the idea of you getting hurt because of a fire still scares me, being without you scares me even more. I don’t want to throw away what we could have because I have issues about what happened to my mum. I don’t want to lose you.”

When Robert had finished speaking, he felt like a weight had been lifted from his chest and he could breathe a little easier. Even if Aaron told him there couldn’t be anything between them, he knew he’d done the right thing by telling him how he felt. It was better to take the risk than never know what could have been.

He looked at Aaron’s face and was shocked to see tears in his eyes again. He couldn’t stop himself; he leant forward, reached out and cupped Aaron’s cheek with his hand. “Aaron,” he said simply.

Aaron closed his eyes for a moment, but Robert was delighted when he leaned into the touch against his face ever so slightly. When Aaron opened his eyes again, he had a tiny, watery smile on his face. “I wish we’d both been better at talking,” he murmured. “But thank you. Thank you for telling me now. I know it can’t have been easy. I’m so sorry about what happened to your mum – I can’t imagine how hard that must have been for you to deal with.”

It was Robert’s turn to take a breath and try to compose himself.

“I don’t want you to feel like you have to deal with things on your own,” Aaron continued. “You can talk to me. I might not be very good with words but I’ll always be there to listen. And I get it…I understand why my job would be particularly hard for you to deal with after what happened to your mum. But you have to know that what I’m doing every day is completely different to that. I want you to be able to talk to me if you’re feeling worried about it. And I promise you, I’ll always do my best to stay safe.”

Robert opened his eyes and looked at him. He felt a spark of hope spread through him at Aaron’s words.

Aaron must have recognised the look on his face and he smiled a little wider, but he almost looked a little shy when he spoke. “Before…when you said that you wanted us to be together, like as a couple, did you mean it?”

Robert felt his heart swell and for the first time a while he felt completely confident about what he wanted to say. He was tired of second guessing himself and wondering what reaction he’d receive. He knew what he wanted. He knew what he felt. He pushed himself forwards on the sofa.

“I love you, Aaron,” he said, and his heart was thudding in his chest, but he knew it was the right time. “I fell in love with you without even realising it had happened. One day I just realised that I didn’t want to think about my life without you in it. I’m in love with you. And I want to be with you – properly.”

There was silence after his declaration and then suddenly Aaron surged forwards, wrapping a hand around the back of Robert’s head and pulling him in for a searing kiss. Robert’s hands cupped Aaron’s face and he allowed himself to be overwhelmed by the sensations of Aaron’s lips against his own.

When Aaron pulled back, and they were both left grinning, he couldn’t resist leaning back in for a quick peck to Robert’s lips. “I love you too,” he said before he kissed him quickly again. It was like he couldn’t bring himself to stop touching Robert. “I don’t want us to be stupid anymore,” he added with a smile

Robert chuckled. “No more stupidness,” he agreed and then he leaned in to kiss Aaron again.

***

After the shift that Aaron had had, the evening of worry that Robert had had, and the emotionally draining heart-to-heart that they’d shared, neither of them had the energy to do much more than head to Aaron’s bed and sink into it together.

They lay pressed together, fingers smoothing over skin knowing that, for tonight, it didn’t need to lead to anything. They had plenty of time for that. And they had plenty of time to talk about everything that they needed to discuss properly. Robert knew that he while he’d opened up about the death of his mother, there was still more that needed to be said. He was starting to realise that he needed further help to deal with it, especially if he wanted to be committed to his relationship with Aaron, which he really did, without panicking every time Aaron was called out to a fire. For now though, they were quite happy to just lie there and be close to one another.

“I missed you,” Aaron whispered as Robert’s hand stroked across his waist.

“I missed you too,” Robert told him. “I couldn’t sleep without you,” he admitted, and then he felt his cheeks heat a little and he buried his face into the space between Aaron’s shoulder and his pillow. Since when had he become so soppy? Not so long ago he hadn’t even been able to admit to himself that he even cared about Aaron and now he was sharing his most closely guarded thoughts and feelings. For a moment he was worried that Aaron would mock him for being soft, but he should have known better really.

Aaron shuffled a little and nuzzled his own head further into his pillow. He waited until Robert had shifted and dared to peer up at him so he could look into Robert’s eyes. “Don’t hide from me,” he murmured. He ran a hand through Robert’s hair gently, before his blunt fingernails scratched slightly at the back of his head, just how Robert liked.

It was almost scary how well they knew each other. Almost. Robert wasn’t afraid of that anymore and he wasn’t afraid of how Aaron made him feel or how he could actually picture their future together and he wasn’t afraid to admit that that was what he wanted more than anything.

“I’m not hiding anymore,” he replied, before he closed the gap between them and kissed Aaron deeply. “I love you,” he told him when he settled back against his pillow.

Aaron’s soft smile was everything that Robert needed. “I love you, too,” he replied.

For the first time in weeks, they both slept easily.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They figured it out – finally! I hope you enjoyed the ending: I’d love to know what you thought. I’m snarfettelove on tumblr.


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